Batman vs Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2019)

Batman vs Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2019) poster
Rating: 2

An animated crossover where you cannot help but think that the two styles of either – a grim loner who lives in a dark milieu vs a team of manic teenagers spouting surfer speak – are only going to end up clashing

Batman vs. Two-Face (2017)

Batman vs. Two-Face (2017) poster
Rating: 2

Batman: Return of the Caped Crusaders, an animated homage to the 1960s Batman tv series reuniting Adam West and Burt Ward, was a quirky delight. This is a sequel in the same vein, although more a case of a joke that tires in the retelling

Batman: Year One (2011)

Batman Year One (2011) poster
Rating: 3.5

Animated adaptation of the classic Frank Miller graphic novel, this is dark, psychologically brooding, far more adult than the children’s niche it is sold to, and with producer Bruce Timm and his team at the top of their game

Battle League Horumo (2009)

Battle League Horumo (2009) poster
Rating: 3

Japanese film about teams that engage in combat tournaments with hordes of Smurf-like creatures. This spends too much time on its high school drama cliches but eventually finds the dementia of its concept at the climax

Be Kind Rewind (2008)

Be Kind Rewind (2008) poster
Rating: 3

Riding at a peak during the mid-2000s, cult director Michel Gondry made this head-scratcher where he eccentrically devotes an entire film to homemade amateur fan filmmaking – all with appealingly wacky results

Beastly (2011)

Beastly (2011) poster
Rating: 2.5

The interesting idea of the fairytale Beauty and the Beast retold in a modern high school setting. Despite itself, the film manages to wring a reasonable sincerity out of the premise

Beastmaster 2: Through the Portal of Time (1991)

Beastmaster 2: Through the Portal of Time (1991) poster
Rating: 0-

Excruciating sequel to The Beastmaster that transports Marc Singer’s Dar to contemporary L.A. The whole film is wrecked by an attitude that seems unable to take the proceedings seriously.

Beasts of the Southern Wild (2012)

Beasts of the Southern Wild (2012) poster
Rating: 4

Extraordinary Sundance breakout hit that sits between a portrayal of a unique backwoods culture and a Magical Realist child’s eye viewpoint. A quite amazing film that announces one of the freshest directorial voices to emerge in ages

Beau is Afraid (2023)

Beau is Afraid (2023) poster
Rating: 3.5

Ari Aster’s third film had many audiences scratching their heads. It follows Joaquin Phoenix on an allegorical journey that becomes a dark comedy and an entirely surreal Freudian nightmare

Beautiful Creatures (2013)

Beautiful Creatures (2013) poster
Rating: 3

Attempt to create another Twilight franchise that quickly becomes the anti-Twilight, shucking the pro-chastity message for a decidedly inflammatory stance against small-minded Christian prejudice

Beauty and the Beast (1991)

Beauty and the Beast (1991) poster
Rating: 4

The start of the 90s renaissance of Disney animation, a beautifully made adaptation of the fairytale that hearkens back to the Disney Golden Age. The only animated film nominated for an Academy Award Best Picture

Beauty and the Beast (2014)

Beauty and the Beast (2014) poster
Rating: 4

Adaptation of the fairytale that takes place in an exquisitely dreamy sumptuousness – a stunningly designed, costumed and photographed world that has a genuine magic. However, the motion-capture animated Beast looks far too much like a CGI effect

Beauty and the Beast (2017)

Beauty and the Beast (2017) poster
Rating: 3

This live-action remake of the Disney animated film is mounted with a lavishness. On the other hand, the romance at the centre never fully warms up, while the human characters have the show stolen from under by the cutlery and furnishings

Bedtime Stories (2008)

Bedtime Stories (2008) poster
Rating: 1

An unfunny Adam Sandler film in which he plays a guy whose bedtime stories come true. Sandler regards himself as the funniest guy in the room and doesn’t even seem to be making an effort.

Beetlejuice (1988)

Beetlejuice (1988) poster
Rating: 3.5

This was where the world took notice of Tim Burton in his second film. This throws the standard ghost story on its head with the dead trying to exorcise the living. The show is dominated by Burton’s wild set-pieces and Michael Keaton’s OTT title performance

Beetlejuice Beetlejuice (2024)

Beetlejuice Beetlejuice (2024) poster
Rating: 2

After 36 years and several abortive attempts, Tim Burton, Michael Keaton and Winona Ryder reunite to make a sequel to Beetlejuice, but the essentials that fired up the young Burton now feel as they come by the numbers

Before I Fall (2017)

Before I Fall (2017) poster
Rating: 2

Essentially Groundhog Day for teenage girls as Zoey Deutch finds herself trapped in a timeloop living the same day at high school over and over. The film finds a reasonable emotional depth but some of Zoey’s concerns do seem just a little trivial

Begotten (1990)

Begotten (1990) poster
Rating: 2

The first film from E. Elias Merhige, subsequent director of Shadow of the Vampire. An unfathomably strange film in the Eraserhead vein about gods disemboweling themselves, rebirthing and being beset upon by nomads.

Being John Malkovich (1999)

Being John Malkovich (1999) poster
Rating: 4

Hilariously eccentric Spike Jonze-Charlie Kaufman collaboration in which John Cusack finds an office building that has a portal that takes someone through into actor John Malkovich’s head. The wacky spins that the script places on the idea are ingenious

Belladonna of Sadness (1973)

Belladonna of Sadness (1973) poster
Rating: 2.5

Osama Tezuka is a cult figure in anime and manga – what is less well known is that he also made adult animation. This, about a woman’s temptation by The Devil in mediaeval France, is a mind-boggling array of psychedelia and eroticism

Bells of Innocence (2003)

Bells of Innocence (2003) poster
Rating: 1.5

Perhaps the strangest film on Chuck Norris’s cv – the film where Chuck plays an angel. A work of Christian horror where Chuck’s son Mike plays a decent man trapped in a sinister Western town of devil worshipping children

Beloved (1998)

Beloved (1998) poster
Rating: 5

Adapted from an award-winning Toni Morrison novel, this is an African-American ghost story that comes with Serious Drama written all over it. Produced by/starring Oprah Winfrey, the film was overlooked at the major award but is a stunning, emotionally raw work

Beowulf (2007)

Beowulf (2007) poster
Rating: 3.5

After the success of the motion captured animated The Polar Express, Robert Zemeckis turned his attentions to the classic legend. Armed with a Neil Gaiman script and a host of name actors in the mocap suits, the result is a soaring fantasy

Better Man (2024)

Better Man (2024) poster
Rating: 3.5

This comes with a head-scratching premise – a biopic of pop star Robbie Williams but where Robbie is portrayed as a CGI ape. Essentially, the rock star biopic by way of one of the Planet of the Apes reboot films

Between Worlds (2018)

Between Worlds (2018) poster
Rating: 3

Nicolas Cage career from the mid-2010s gives all impression he has chosen projects for the full-on dementia value. Here he lets all stops go as the spirit of his late wife possesses the body of the teenage daughter of the woman he is seeing

Beverly Hills Chihuahua (2008)

Beverly Hills Chihuahua (2008) poster
Rating: 0-

One of the most inane talking animals film ever – the tale of a spoiled Beverly Hills dogs who has to make her way home after being abandoned in Mexico. Filled with excruciating slapstick and animals spouting smartass one-liners

Bewitched (2005)

Bewitched (2005) poster
Rating: 2

The hit 1960s sitcom is repackaged as a frothy Nora Ephron romcom that suffers from a fatal mismatching of a showboating Will Ferrell and a more subdued Nicole Kidman who do not seem to connect in any way as Darren and Samantha

The BFG (2016)

The BFG (2016) poster
Rating: 3

Steven Spielberg adapts the Roald Dahl story. Despite the film bombing at the box-office, it is one of considerable charms. Spielberg doesn’t produce another E.T. but then he hasn’t delivered another Hook either

Big Fish (2003)

Big Fish (2003) poster
Rating: 2

Tim Burton film where Albert Finney plays a habitual teller of tall tales whose son sets out to find the truth. Burton’s characteristic quirkiness seems buried by such a blandness you suspect he has been replaced by a clone of Ron Howard

Big Top Pee-Wee (1988)

Big Top Pee-Wee (1988) poster
Rating: 3

Pee-Wee’s Big Adventure proved a quirky hit and so Pee-Wee was spun out in this sequel. This lacks the zany touch of Tim Burton in the director’s chair, nevertheless has its own moments

Big Trouble in Little China (1986)

Big Trouble in Little China (1986) poster
Rating: 3

John Carpenter film that was marketed as a Raiders of the Lost Ark copy but is more Carpenter trying to emulate Hong Kong’s Wu Xia cinema, which was largely unknown in the West at the time. All with highly enjoyable conic results.

Bill and Ted’s Bogus Journey (1991)

Bill and Ted's Bogus Journey (1991) poster
Rating: 2

The sequel to Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure where the first film’s humour gets lost amid repetition and blown up by a big-budget. William Sadler’s Death however proves a scene-stealer

Birds of Prey and the Fantabulous Emancipation of One Harley Quinn (2020)

Birds of Prey and the Fantabulous Emancipation of One Harley Quinn (2020) poster
Rating: 2

The DC comic-book Birds of Prey is hijacked to become a vehicle for Harley Quinn, the breakout character from Suicide Squad. Margot Robbie gives the impression she has zero interest in making a film for comic-book fans

Black Adam (2022)

Black Adam (2022) poster
Rating: 3

An entry from the abortive attempt to create a DC Comics shared universe. Dwayne Johnson takes on the role of the DC’s anti-hero in a film that is far more fun than the recent Marvel offerings

Black Orpheus (1959)

Black Orpheus (1959) poster
Rating: 4

An extraordinary film that offers a modern retelling of the Greek myth of Orpheus and Eurydice, relocating it amid the Rio Carnival with striking and colourful results

The Black Rider: Revelation Road (2014)

The Black Rider: Revelation Road (2014) poster
Rating: 2

The third Revelation Road film, this offers the bizarre novelty of a faith-based Mad Max copy with divinely inspired action hero David A.R. White cruising the post-apocalyptic wastelands in the aftermath of The Rapture

The Black Spider (2022)

The Black Spider (2022) poster
Rating: 3.5

A standout Swiss-made film, an exceptionally well written work about a pact made with the devil by a mediaeval village that unleashes a plague of spiders and other curses upon them

Blade of the Immortal (2017)

Blade of the Immortal (2017) poster
Rating: 2.5

Takashi Miike’s 100th film, the adaptation of a manga about an immortal samurai. Miike bookends the film with awesome sequences with his hero battling hundreds of opponents but the film in between drags

Bleach (2018)

Bleach (2018) poster
Rating: 2

The live-action adaptation of a manga about a teenager who inherits the powers of Soul Reaper and is thrust into a battle against monstrous supernatural entities

The Blue Bird (1976)

The Blue Bird (1976) poster
Rating: 0-

A ghastly fairytale adaptation. Classic Hollywood director George Cukor took several stars to shoot in the Soviet Union and the results look like a badly choreographed amateur pantomime, lacking in any essential whimsy

Blue Remembered Hills (1979)

Blue Remembered Hills (1979) poster
Rating: 4

I have said it before and will say it again – Dennis Potter was the greatest writer to ever work in television. This is his classic work depicting childhood where all the roles of the children are played by adults

Blues Brothers 2000 (1998)

Blues Brothers 2000 (1998) poster
Rating: 1

John Landis and Dan Aykroyd minus the late John Belushi revisit their cult classic but the reunion exercise smacks of poor judgement and emerges as a haphazard arrangement made only to exploit the appeal of the original

The Book of Life (2014)

The Book of Life (2014) poster
Rating: 3.5

An animated film produced by Guillermo Del Toro that draws on his Mexican heritage and Day of the Dead mythology. An amazingly colourful and happy film with one of the most unique design schemes ever

The Book Thief (2013)

The Book Thief (2013) poster
Rating: 2

Narrated by Death, this story of a young girl growing up in Nazi Germany comes with the self-importance of awards consideration bait. One of the great crimes of modern history (The Holocaust) is reduced to picture postcard sentiments

Borgman (2013)

Borgman (2013) poster
Rating: 3.5

A cryptically surreal Dutch film that comes with hilariously black deadpan effect as we watch a homeless man inveigle his way into a household and take over before starting to eliminate people.

The Borrowers [Season 1] (1992)

The Borrowers (1992) poster
Rating: 4

Absolutely delightful and charming BBC series about a family of miniature people who live in secrecy inside the walls of human houses. The best of several versions of the popular books

The Borrowers (1997)

The Borrowers (1997) poster
Rating: 3

Amiable adaptation of Mary Norton’s books about a family of miniature people that live in hiding in a human house. Aimed for big scale effects and slapstick set-pieces but sufficiently engaging nevertheless

The Boss Baby (2017)

The Boss Baby (2017) poster
Rating: 2

This has one of the most original nemeses created for an animated film – a baby in business suit and briefcase and with the demeanour of a ruthless corporate CEO – only for the film to then go and soften the character

The BoxTrolls (2014)

The BoxTrolls (2014) poster
Rating: 3

From Laika, a stop-motion animated work about misunderstood creatures who wear boxes as shells and are perceived as monsters by polite society. An enormous degree of creativity has gone into this

The Boy and the Beast (2015)

The Boy and the Beast (2015) poster
Rating: 3

If Hayao Miyazaki ever follows through on his threat to retire, the one most likely inheritor would be Mamoru Hosoda. This is a perfectly enjoyably film that is sort of The Karate Kid by way of Disney’s The Jungle Book

The Boy and the Heron (2023)

The Boy and the Heron (2023) poster
Rating: 3

The twelfth film from Hayao Miyzaki at age 82, a quasi-autobiographical if a slightly less classic work. A renaissance of many Miyazaki themes as a boy follows a heron though into a strange fantasy otherworld