Return to House on Haunted Hill (2007)
Haunted House
Cheaply made sequel to the remake of House on Haunted Hill that turns it into a teen film dominated by gore set-pieces
Film Series and Sequels
Wrong Turn 2: Dead End (2007)
Backwoods Brutality
A sequel that has been arranged for the sole purpose of serving up a series of gory dispatch set-pieces every few minutes
Live Free or Die Hard (2007)
Action Film/Socially Catastrophic Hack Attack
The fourth of the Die Hard films and the only one that enters into genre territory with Bruce Willis now fighting a catastrophic hack attack that disables the entire US
Mother of Tears: The Third Mother (2007)
Italian Occult Horror
After 27 years, Dario Argento finally rounds out his Three Mothers trilogy begun way back with Suspiria but the underwhelming results give all evidence of his having lost his mojo
Hostel Part II (2007)
Sadism and Torture
Eli Roth’s sequel to his earlier hit, this emerges as a pallid copy of its predecessor, having merely changed the sexes of the protagonists and lacking the original’s gut-churning impact
The Sandlot: Heading Home (2007)
Baseball Star Returns to His Childhood
The third in a popular series of films about a Little League baseball team, this involves a time travel element
[Rec] (2007)
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Zombie Film/Found Footage
Furious and highly engaging Spanish Found Footage film about the infected dead taking over an apartment building. Three sequels and an English-language remake followed
30 Days of Night (2007)
Small Town in Alaska Overrun by Vampires
Solid vampire film produced by Sam Raimi about a small Alaskan town that suddenly finds itself besieged by vampires who have come because of the month of night
The Messengers (2007)
Haunting
The Pang Brothers, two of the most exciting genre directors in the world, have their distinctive style swallowed up in their bland US mainstream debut produced by Sam Raimi
Transmorphers (2007)
Asylum Mockbuster/Alien Robot Invasion
The Asylum’s answer to Michael Bay’s Transformers. Bay had a $150 million budget; they try to copy it for $250,000. To its credit, the film flies valiantly to deliver a watchable show in the face of inadequate effects
300 (2007)
Fantasticised Historical Battle/Graphic Novel Adaptation
Zack Snyder’s adaptation of the classic Frank Miller graphic novel about the Greek battle of Thermopylae. In replicating the look of the original’s panels, Snyder pushes what would otherwise be a standard historical film into something extraordinarily stylised and fantastic
Resident Evil: Extinction (2007)
Videogame Adaptation/Post-Holocaust Zombies
Third of the Resident Evil films. This expands the scale of action to show the entire world destroyed by the virus but for all that and a decent budget, director Russell Mulcahy fails to push the elements to a suitable head of steam
Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End (2007)
Pirate Fantasy Swashbuckler
Third of the Pirates of the Caribbean films and purportedly made without a completed script, this becomes bloated and sprawling
TMNT (2007)
Comic-Book Superheroes/Animation
Animated revival of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, which brings them back to the screen with a satisfyingly gritty edge and a series of kinetic action sequences
The Man From Earth (2007)
Immortal Man
Beautifully written film about an immortal. The result is an entirely captivating SF film whose whole effect emerges simply from people sitting in a living room talking
Transformers (2007)
Live-Action Transformer Robots
Michael Bay takes on the 1980s toy phenomenon, turning it into a massive blockbuster filled with copious mass destruction and machines beating the metal crap out of each other
Paranormal Activity (2007)
Haunting Found Footage Film
No-budget film that became a word of mouth hit, spawned a series of sequels and sparked off the Found Footage fascination that took over the 2010s. Unlike most of the films that followed, Oren Peli creates a creepingly chill atmosphere and some undeniable jumps
Stir of Echoes: The Awakening (2007)
Gulf War Vet Receives Visions
Stir of Echoes was a spookily effective film. Alas in this sequel, we go from Kevin Bacon as a medium to Rob Lowe as a haunted Iraq War veteran amid a series of routine pop-up scares
White Noise: The Light (2007)
Premonitions of Death
A sSequel in name only to White Noise, this is a very silly film with Nathan Fillion returning from a near-death experience able to see the auras of those about to die
28 Weeks Later (2007)
Post-Holocaust/Zombie Outbreak
I was cautious about hailing 28 Days Later as a modern classic; this sequel is in fact a much better film. Newcomer director Juan Carlos Fresnadillo draws it out into a series of superbly sustained suspense sequences
Twitches Too (2007)
Twin Sister Witches
Having to sit through the Mowray twins airhead natter again in a sequel to their early Disney Channel film feels the equivalent of nails being scratched on a blackboard
Outpost (2007)
Nazi Zombies
Above average revival of the Nazi zombie concept in a film that has spawned two sequels. The plot of soldiers venturing into an old bunker is conducted with tight, lean suspense and some undeniably gory dispatches
Spider-Man 3 (2007)
Comic-Book Superhero
Last and by general opinion the least of the Sam Raimi-Tobey Maguire Spider-Man films. With three super-villains present, the plot feels as though it is bursting at the seams juggling the various origin stories and ongoing dramas, although Raimi still delivers some solid superheroic action scenes
Species: The Awakening (2007)
Alien Sex Fiend
Fourth entry in the Species series where at least the series seems to have gravitated to the arena of the trashily absurd B movie it belongs
Vacancy (2007)
Remote Motel Torture and Sadism
A reasonable film clearly influenced by Hostel with Luke Wilson and Kate Beckinsale as a married couple who sign into a backroads motel used to shoot snuff movies
Shrek the Third (2007)
Animation/Fairytale Spoof
The third of the Shrek films settles in with a formulaic blandness where the characters turn up more because everyone expects them to than the film finds much for them to do
In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale (2007)
Epic Fantasy Adventure/Videogame Adaptation
Another of Uwe Boll’s videogame adaptations and one of his better. Boll is seeking to emulate the 00s epic fantasy fad and succeeds with some great action choreography from Ching Siu-Tung
Saw IV (2007)
Killer's Sadistic Games
Fourth of the Saw films, the third under Darren Lynn Bousman who has placed an increasing emphasis on torturous extremes at the expense of credible plotting
Enchanted (2007)
Animated Fairytale Characters Enter the Real World
Disney film where an animated fairytale princess emerges into the real world to become Amy Adams. This becomes the opportunity to wittily puncture the unreal world of the Disney fairytale
Evangelion 1.0: You Are (Not) Alone (2007)
Anime/Invasion by Vast Alien Machines
The first in a series of film reboots of the Neon Genesis Evangelion anime tv series. Epic animation but you need to the part of the fanbase of the original to understand what is going on
Diary of the Dead (2007)
Zombie Found Footage Film
George Romero returns to zombies, making a Found Footage film. After the disappointment of Land of the Dead, he delivers the goods here, while making powerful political points about modern media
Evan Almighty (2007)
Modern-Day Noah's Ark Comedy
Sequel to Bruce Almighty in which Steve Carell is transformed into a modern-day Noah. This was pitched to the Christian audiences but feels like a series of lame gags playing on Noah and the Ark devoid of any biblical context
Cinderella III: A Twist in Time (2007)
Disney Animation Sequel
Another cheap Disney made-for-video-release sequel. This at least offers the novelty of an alternate retelling of Cinderella but everything transpires predictably
Appleseed Ex Machina (2007)
Anime/Future Anti-Terrorist Squad
Shinji Aramaki’s immediate sequel to his reboot of the Appleseed franchise. This lacks the visually stunning qualities of its predecessor and seems more conceptually muddled but Aramaki eventually gets it together
AVPR: Aliens vs Predator Requiem (2007)
Alien/Predator Series' Crossover
Second of the Alien/Predator crossovers and the absolute nadir of either series. Gone is the suspense of either series’ earlier entries and the creatures are now no more than standard monsters in a teen horror film
Carved: The Slit Mouthed Woman (2007)
Boogeywoman from Japanese Urban Legend
J-horror film based on the Japanese urban legend of a boogeywoman with a face slit from ear to ear who appears to kill people
Highlander: The Source (2007)
Immortal Quest
The fifth of the Highlander films. It is hard to believe people could actually make a film worse than Highlander II but this is akin to Edward D. Wood Jr on a multi-million dollar budget
Highlander: The Search for Vengeance (2007)
Immortal Combat/Anime
The Highlander series conducts an anime variant on the franchise set in a post-apocalyptic future. Co-directed by Yoshiaki Kawajiri of Ninja Scroll fame who adds some highly stylised moves
Garfield Gets Real (2007)
Lazy Talking Cat/Animation
Animated film spun off from the Garfield comic-strips in which Garfield emerges out into the real world. A cute premise that the film fails to develop
Cold Blood: The Last Hurrah (2007)
Serial Killer Thriller
The fifth and final of the Cold Blood films, brings Matthew Kelly’s serial killer back but still lacks the gripping tension of the first two films
Bloodrayne: Deliverance (2007)
Videogame Adaptation/Vampire Western
The second in Uwe Boll’s trilogy adapted from the videogame, this plays out as a mix of Western and vampire hunter film and is marginally better than Boll’s usual standards
Battlestar Galactica: Razor (2007)
Space Opera
A spinoff film from the Battlestar Galactica revival series that flashes back to tell the story of the divisive figure of Commander Cain, featuring fine performances and the series’ usual high level of writing
Hellboy Animated: Blood and Iron (2007)
Demon Superhero/Animation
The second of two animated Hellboy spinoffs, this renders what might have been impressive superheroics had they been conducted in live-action down at the level of children’s animation
Hannibal Rising (2007)
Hannibal Lecter Origin Story
Building on the successes of the Hannibal Lecter films, this is a prequel that goes back sets out to tell an origin story of how the young teenage Hannibal came to be who he was during World War II
Amateur Porn Star Killer (2007)
Snuff Movie Mockumentary
Extraordinary Found Footage film from Shane Ryan shot from the viewpoint of a killer as he seduces and kills a girl. A quasi-pornographic film that makes us question our own complicity in what we are watching
Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer (2007)
Comic-Book Superheroes
The 2005 Fantastic Four was an amiable entry among the Marvel Comics adaptations of the 2000s. This sequel substitutes lowbrow comedy and renders the great character of the Silver Surfer as a CGI cartoon
Halloween (2007)
Slasher Film
Another inferior entry in the mid-00s fad remake of 70s/80s horror films. Whereas John Carpenter gave us Michael Myers as evil incarnate, Rob Zombie gives us Michael Myers as a misunderstood and unloved kid
Ghost Rider (2007)
Comic-Book Avenger/Demonic Superhero
Film adaptation of Marvel Comics’ demon superhero emerges as better than it had the right to be. The risibility of the image of a motorcycle-riding demon hero is made to work through some vivid and way-out effects
Alvin and the Chipmunks (2007)
Singing Chipmunks
The squeaky helium-voiced Chipmunks are brought to life via CGI in this live-action film, featuring the chipmunks causing chaos, cracking smart-ass one-liners and lots of pee and poop jokes. The results are excrutiating
Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix (2007)
Young Wizard
The fifth and in my opinion the best of the Harry Potter films. It is the first film where we see the darkening of emotions and the children growing up as storm clouds gather. Much of the show is stolen by Imelda Staunton
The Hills Have Eyes II (2007)
Backroads Brutality
Sequel to the 2006 remake of Wes Craven’s Backwoods Brutality classic (not to be confused with the sequel that Craven made to his original), this is premised around a series of extremely gory set-pieces
Bambi II (2006)
Disney Animation/Talking Animals
One of the better video-released Disney sequels churned out during the 90s/00s, this finds some of the innocence of the original even if it never scales the same heights
Cold Blood (2005-2006)
Serial Killer Thriller
One of the best copies of The Silence of the Lambs, a British tv mini-series in which police must seek the help of imprisoned serial killer Matthew Kelly, who delivers a great performance in the role
Yeti: A Love Story (2006)
Gay Yeti/Troma Film
Troma film about a group of trampers attacked by a Yeti only for one of the group to discover gay love with the Yeti
See No Evil (2006)
Slasher Film
Modern slasher film where the sole note of distinction is the wrestler known as Kane cast as the hulking killer. Outside of a moderate level of brutality in the despatches, there is little here that stands out from the genre’s cliches in any way
Ice Age 2 (2006)
Animation/Prehistoric Talking Animals
The first in a series of interminable sequels to Blue Sky Studios’ animated prehistoric adventure. Everything has a tediousness that feels as though it is created by a script generating computer
Happy Feet (2006)
Animation/Talking and Dancing Penguins
George Miller of Mad Max fame makes a motion-capture animated film about a young penguin who sets out to fulfill his dream of tap-dancing. This ends up being a film of unexpectedly winning charms
Evil Bong (2006)
Demonic Marijuana Bong
From Charles Band, this features a possessed marijuana bong that sucks those that imbibe inside into the simulation of a stripper bar where they lose their souls. Several sequels followed.
One Missed Call: Final (2006)
Haunted Cellphone Calls
Takashi Miike’s One Missed Call was one of the more popular of the Ringu-influenced Japanese ghost stories, concerning a viral curse passed by cellphone calls. This was the second Japanese sequel
WarGames: The Dead Code (2006)
Teen Hacker Thriller/Amok A.I.
WarGames was a thriller that was way ahead of its time; this sequel is no more than video fodder exploiting recognition factor that reduces the original to hacker movie cliches in a technically ill-informed and incoherent plot
Feast (2006)
Monster Movie
A smartly funny monster movie with various people at siege in a bar and under attack by creatures. This takes great delight in puncturing the cliches of the genre. Two sequels followed.
Happily N’Ever After (2006)
Animation/Fairytale Deconstruction
Another in the spate of animated fairytale parodies that came out in the wake of Shrek, this subjects Cinderella to an excruciating barrage of pop-culture jokes and one-liners
Hatchet (2006)
Slasher Film Homage
This was Adam Green’s homage to the Friday the 13th series that comes with the virtue of a high level of gore and a sense of humour. This was subsequently spun out to several sequels
Silent Hill (2006)
Videogame Adaptation/Sinister Otherworldly Town
One of the best of all filmed videogame adaptations. Christophe Gans creates a creepy and unworldly atmosphere, along with a series of genuinely outlandish creature effects
Night at the Museum (2006)
Museum Exhibits Come to Life
Popular family hit with Ben Stiller as a night watchman at New York’s Museum of Natural History who discovers that the exhibits come to life at night. More a cute idea than a full film, there is some fun to the characters and effects
The Initiation of Sarah (2006)
Occult War Between Rival Sororities
A remake of the 1978 tv movie about occult rituals in a girl’s sorority house. This is a film that feels directed and written without any real involvement by those responsible.
The Hamiltons (2006)
Disturbed Family
An indie horror film about a strange and disturbing family of adult children. The whole film hangs on an interesting mid-film conceptual revelation
X-Men: The Last Stand (2006)
Comic-Book Superheroes
Brett Ratner inherits the X-Men franchise from Bryan Singer for the third film in the series and promptly killed it off (after this point everything became prequels featuring Young X-Men). Ratner’s handling of the superheroic action lacks Singer’s exhilaration or any affinity for the characters
Hellboy Animated: Sword of Storms (2006)
Demon Superhero/Animation
The first of two animated Hellboy spinoffs with the live-action actors returning to voice their parts. This is the better of the two animated films, developing a weirdness as it takes Hellboy inside a Japanese spirit realm
Superman Returns (2006)
Comic-Book Superhero
This has a bad reputation but Bryan Singer does a wonderful job in bringing Superman back to the screen in a version surprisingly reliant on the Christopher Reeve films. The superheroics soar and Kevin Spacey makes for the best screen Lex Luthor ever
Open Season (2006)
Animation/Talking Animals
Passable animated film from Sony Pictures Animation, although the story arcs too closely resemble every other animated film for it to have much in the way of notability
Mission: Impossible III (2006)
Spy/Action Film
For his third outing in the series, Tom Cruise made a smart bet on giving the reins to J.J. Abrams who made his directorial debut and turned in the most enjoyable entry in the series to that point. One of the best moves is in the casting of Philip Seymour Hoffman as the villain of the show
Cars (2006)
Pixar Animation/Talking Vehicles
Winning animated film from Pixar based around the appealingly original idea of vehicles having personalities. The idea is spun out with considerable wit and sophistication. Two sequels followed.
Superman II: The Richard Donner Cut (2006)
Comic-Book Superhero
The original version of Superman II became mired in problems over the firing of director Richard Donner. After the rediscovery of the original footage, Donner was able to go offer up a restored version. Seeing the storylines the way they were meant to be and Marlon Brando’s original scenes as Jor-el make for a work that is superior in every way
The Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning (2006)
Backwoods Brutality
Prequel to the 2003 Texas Chainsaw Massacre remake, which sets out to tell the origin story of the cannibal family. New director Jonathan Liebesman pushes the gore and sadism to Torture Porn extremes
The Grudge 2 (2006)
Haunting
Follow-up to The Grudge, the English-language remake of the Japanese horror film. Although original Japanese director Takashi Shimizu is present, this is one of the weaker Ju-on/Grudge films
Pulse (2006)
Soul-Sucking Creatures from the Internet
As part of the mid-00s fad for English-language remakes of Japanese horror films, Kiyoshi Kuroawa’s unfathomable but undeniably creepy internet horror is reworked as a standard teen film
Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest (2006)
Pirate Fantasy Swashbuckler
The second of the Pirates of the Caribbean films. Johnny Depp and all the principals are back and much of the eccentric humour is present but the action has undergone budget bloat
Underworld: Evolution (2006)
Vampire-Werewolf War
The second of the Underworld films where Len Wiseman gets a bigger budget and amplifies the CGI and action sequences,. On the other hand, the characters and story are so stripped to a minimum you lose track of why things are happening
Death Note (2006)
Notebook with Killing Powers
Uniquely original Japanese horror film adapted from a manga concerning a book that kills anyone whose name is written in it. This has spawned several sequels and an American remake. The show is stolen by the supremely weird Kenichi Matsuyama
Arthur and the Invisibles (2006)
Miniature Magical World
Lightweight Luc Besson directed children’s fantasy with a young boy shrunken down to miniature size to engage in a series of CGI animated adventures among a race of fairy-like people. Several sequels followed
Hollow Man II (2006)
Invisible Maniac
Utterly generic sequel to Paul Verhoeven’s invisible man film Hollow Man. This one has been so cheaply made that it even recycles its effects from the first film
Basic Instinct 2 (2006)
Psycho-Sexual Thriller
Sequel to Basic Instinct made fourteen years later. Sharon Stone vamps her way across the screen but the heated sexuality of the original has been watered down to a lukewarm whimper
Death Note: The Last Name (2006)
Notebook with Killing Powers
The second of the Japanese Death Note films, released almost back-to-back with the first. This is an even better film than its predecessor, delighting in the twists and turns in the games as Light and his nemesis L outwit each other
Merlin’s Apprentice (2006)
Arthurian Legends Adventure
Sequel to Hallmark’s earlier tv mini-series Merlin featuring a return performance from Sam Neill in the title role, this is otherwise a generic and unmemorable work of Arthurian fantasy
Santa Baby (2006)
Santa's Daughter
TV movie where Jenny McCarthy plays Santa’s daughter who takes over the family business
The Santa Clause 3: The Escape Clause (2006)
Santa vs Jack Frost
Third of the Santa Clause films starring Tim Allen as Santa where his reality is upended by the evil Jack Frost
Day Watch (2006)
Night Watch Sequel/Supernatural War
Timur Bekmambetov’s sequel to Night Watch comes with a much better budget and the same wild visuals, although is slightly the lesser film
The Da Vinci Code (2006)
Secret History of Christianity/Historical Conspiracy
Ron Howard directed film version of Dan Brown’s best-selling book. This is historical nonsense woven into a fancifully absurd conspiracy theory where Howard does no more than offer an illustrated version of the book
The Hills Have Eyes (2006)
Backroads Brutality
Wes Craven’s Backwoods Brutality classic gets a gore-drenched makeover from Alexandre Aja. One of the better amid the 2000s fad for horror remakes where the original is dragged into the modern day in some interesting ways
Creepshow III (2006)
Horror Anthology
A third entry in the Creepshow series but made without the involvement of George Romero (or Stephen King). This tries to give more of the same but is abysmally made on all counts
Saw III (2006)
Killer's Sadistic Games
Third of the Saw films and the point where director Darren Lynn Bousman places the series’ focus on grim gore-drenched sadism and torture
Garfield: A Tale of Two Kitties (2006)
Lazy Talking Cat
Where the first live-action Garfield film approximated the original comic-strip and its focus on a cat delivering sarcastic lines, this sequel pitches everything down to the level of an inane children’s film
Nightmare Detective (2006)
Dream Killer
A clearly more commercial film from cult Japanese director Shinya Tsukamoto of Tetsuo: The Iron Man fame. This draws influence from Ring but this lacks much of the obsessive drive of Tsukamoto’s other films
Final Destination 3 (2006)
Precognition/Doomed Rollercoaster Crash Survivors
The original creative team behind the Final Destination series, James Wong and Glen Morgan, return for this sequel but only provide a routine series of bizarre novelty deaths following the premonition of a rollercoaster disaster
Scary Movie 4 (2006)
Genre Spoof
Fourth of the Scary Movie films and the usual crude inanity, although under David Zucker the movie parodies have expanded well beyond what can be labelled scary movies any longer
The Librarian: Return to King Solomon’s Mines (2006)
Adventure Film
The second of The Librarian tv movies featuring Noah Wyle as an Indiana Jones-modelled adventurer in search of mythical artifacts – here a map to King Solomon’s Mines
Dr. Dolittle 3 (2006)
Teenager That Can Speak to Animals
Sequel to the Eddie Murphy Dr Dolittle films without Murphy where the title role is inherited by Kyla Pratt as his teenage daughter. The humour is pitched at an excruciating level of inanity
Glass House: The Good Mother (2006)
Evil Foster Parents Psycho-Thriller
A sequel to The Glass House, this time with different cast or orphaned kids and different evil step-parents. This has the bland feel of a tv movie
The Butterfly Effect 2 (2006)
Alternate Timelines
The Butterfly Effect was not a film set up for a sequel but we get one here anyway with a different person flipping back in time to change his rather dull and uninteresting life