Puss in Boots (1999)
Animation/Fairytale
An obscure animated version of the classic fairytale that comes with excruciating puns, much slapstick and has clearly been animated on a low budget
Films of 1999
The Mummy (1999)
Revived Mummy/Adventure
Nominal remake of the Boris Karloff The Mummy, which has now been inflated into a big budget Indiana Jones adventure. Stephen Sommers lets the film overspill with CGI spectacle but the exercise is deflated by a jokey, unserious attitude
Thrill Seekers (1999)
Time Travel
A throwaway direct-to-dvd release about time travellers come back to view famous disasters that rises above low expectations to develop an occasionally interesting plot
Shark Attack (1999)
Killer Shark Film
Killer shark from the 1990s heyday. This works passably as the B movie it is intended as, while the last third turns into the schlockily absurd with the insertion of two different corrupt conspiracy elements and action movie chases
After Alice (1999)
Clairvoyant/Serial Killer Thriller
Kiefer Sutherland is a detective investigating a serial killer who finds he is having clairvoyant dreams. A fairly routine thriller on all counts.
Bridge of Dragons (1999)
Action Film/Atemporal Kingdom Setting
A Dolph Lundgren starring action film about a coup in a kingdom that exists as an oddly atemporal mix of clashing historical periods
The Moment After (1999)
The Biblical Rapture
One of a cluster of faith-based films made around the turn of the millennium dealing with the biblical apocalypse and The Rapture, this has not dated well
Doug’s 1st Movie (1999)
Animation/Children's TV Series Spinoff
Film spinoff of a popular children’s animated tv series Doug about a kid and his observations on life. The film’s story has the title character befriending a local lake monster
Bats (1999)
Killer Bats
There has yet to be a decent killer bat movie. This redresses the balance somewhat by offering up CGI bat effects but otherwise falls prey to a cliche-ridden script
The Bumblebee Flies Anyway (1999)
Experimental Medical Treatments
This feels like a weepie Disease of the Week drama where Elijah Wood is an amnesiac placed in a hospital ward of terminal patients before the film arrives at an SF conceptual twist
Blast from the Past (1999)
Out of the Nuclear Fallout Shelter Comedy
A comedy with the amusing premise where Brendan Fraser is raised in a nuclear fallout shelter since the Cuban Missile Crisis and emerges into the present for the first time, mistaking it for a post-apocalyptic world
Fantasia 2000 (1999)
Disney Animation and Music Anthology
Disney’s sequel to Fantasia comes weighted with a sense of its own self-importance – the first theatrical release of the new millennium. However, it fails to produce much that has the stature of the original
Bloody Murder (1999)
Slasher Film
A modern slasher film that slavishly rehashes Friday the 13th. Routine on most counts, excepting perhaps the oddity of it being made by a director/producer of Christian films
Escape from Mars (1999)
Expedition to Mars
One of several Mars movies that came out around 1999-2000, this concerns the first manned expedition and their efforts to survive after being stranded on the Martian surface
8MM (1999)
Snuff Movie Thriller
This seeks to be another Se7en, adapting a script by Se7en writer Andrew Kevin Walker and employing the same visual style in the story of Nicolas Cage delving into a seedy underworld in search of a snuff movie.
Doctor K (1999)
Faith Healer Surgeon
South Korean film about a doctor with shamanistic powers, this starts out seeming to be a horror film before becoming something different altogether
The Green Mile (1999)
Miracle-Healing Death Row Inmate/Stephen King Addaptation
Frank Darabont had a hit with the Stephen King adaptation The Shawshank Redemption. Here he makes another King adaptation about a Death Row inmate with healing powers
Diplomatic Siege (1999)
Action Film/Nuclear Threat
One of the numerous action films to use a variant on the Die Hard scenario (with an added nuclear threat). For once, this has an okay script and a sense of humour but is killed by a fatal miscasting of its two leads
Deterrence (1999)
Impending Nuclear War
A thriller with Kevin Pollak as the US President caught at a diner by a blizzard where he is faced with the hard choice of whether or not to launch a nuclear attack on Iraq
Desecration (1999)
Catholic Nightmare
This is a surreal and plotless Catholic horror film from Dante Tomaselli that seems full of fairground horror house jumps and overloaded with tortured Catholic imagery but makes no real sense
Deep Blue Sea (1999)
Genetically-Engineered Killer Sharks
A killer shark film by way of Jurassic Park. The perpetually terrible Renny Harlin creates something almost watchable that vies between moments of tension and the entertainingly absurd
The Bone Collector (1999)
Serial Killer Thriller
Serial killer thriller with Denzel Washington as Jeffrey Deaver’s quadriplegic profiler Lincoln Rhyme and Anjelina Jolie as a rookie cop who becomes his aide
Bone Daddy (1998)
Serial Killer Thriller
One of the serial killer thrillers made following The Silence of the Lambs. Rutger Hauer is a medical examiner who publishes a book about an unsolved serial killer case only to bring the killer out of retirement
Candyman: Day of the Dead (1999)
Boogey Man
The second and so far final of the Candyman sequels, a routine entry with Baywatch starlet Donna D’Errico as a descendant of Candyman who is pursued by Tony Todd
Bartok the Magnificent (1999)
Talking Bat's Adventures/Animation
Animator Don Bluth conducts a spinoff from his previous film Anastasia, focusing on the adventures of the talking bat sidekick
The Messenger: The Story of Joan of Arc (1999)
Historical Epic
Luc Besson takes on the Joan of Arc story with then wife Milla Jovovich in the title role but in Besson’s hands it becomes a crazed historical action film that unquestioningly accepts Joan’s visions as real
Komodo (1999)
Giant Lizards Amok
A CGI monster movie directed by a former Industrial Light and Magic visual effects supervisor that features a family under attacks by over-sized komodo lizards
The Astronaut’s Wife (1999)
Alien Possession
Charlize Theron becomes paranoid and suspects her space shuttle astronaut husband Johnny Depp of returning possessed by an alien. Essentially an SF version of Rosemary’s Baby
Lake Placid (1999)
Giant Killer Crocodile
David E. Kelley, better known as a high-profile tv producer, turns his hand to writing a killer crocodile film, although the result never ends up satisfying either as a monster movie or the jokey tone Kelley wants to take
The Item (1999)
Hitmen Guard an Alien Creature
An indie film about hitmen guarding an alien creature, this topples over with ridiculous effects and its affected attempts to be cool
The Last Train (1999)
Train Crash Survivors Emerge into a Post-Apocalyptic World
A British tv mini-series where a group of people in a regular train carriage go into suspended animation and emerge fifty years later to find a devastated world
In Dreams (1999)
Clairvoyance Thriller
In one of his more mainstream films, Neil Jordan takes a leaf from Eyes of Laura Mars as Annette Bening gains psychic insight into the mind of serial killer Robert Downey Jr
The Adventures of Elmo in Grouchland (1999)
Children's Film/Small Furry Creature's Adventures
A rather slight film spinoff red-furred Elmo, the popular character from Sesame Street. A film designed for very young children.
Lethal Target (1999)
Erotica/Alien Infection
Conceptually odd mix of an erotic film and a standard copy of Alien. This come with the peculiarity of steamy encounters sitting alongside chestburster scenes
The Mating Habits of the Earthbound Human (1999)
Alien Anthopolgist Studies Human Mating Behaviour
There is an appealingly satiric concept here – a parody of a nature documentary looking at human mating rituals from an alien perspective where everything is constantly being misinterpreted in terms of an animal behaviour – but what emerges is mostly a one-gag film
King Cobra (1999)
Giant Snake
A very routine B-budget film in which Erik Estrada and Pat Morita face a giant animatronic snake. This was billed as Anaconda 2 in some places.
Instinct (1999)
Killer Anthropologist
This sell itself as Anthony Hopkins in another Hannibal Lecter-like role. Rather than Silence of the Lambs, this emerges more as The Shawshank Redemption by way of Gorillas in the Mist
Tomie (1999)
Japanese Ghost Story
Another Japanese horror film that stands heavily in the shadow of Ringu. Directed without much style and often uninteresting to the point of being dull, it is hard to tell from this that you are watching a film that inspired eight sequels
Ravenous (1999)
Cannibalism
Film about the soldiers at a fort on the American frontier who have descended to cannibalism. A good set-up falls apart due to a comedy treatment
Prophet (1999)
Action/Psychic Powers
Fred Olen Ray and Don ‘The Dragon’ Wilson combine forces on a low-budget action film about psychic powers. The action scenes are competent but the film lacking in the script department
Beowulf (1999)
Epic Legend
An adaptation of the classic epic legend Beowulf that bizarrely recasts the story as a Christopher Lambert-starring action movie and sets it in a post-apocalyptic future
Roswell: The Aliens Attack (1999)
The Roswell Incident/Alien Visitors
Alien invasion film set around the so-called Roswell Incident. Faux science-fiction written by cliche the entire way
A Twist of Faith (1999)
Catholic Serial Killer Thriller
Dull serial killer thriller with Andrew McCarthy tracking a killer that has a Catholic fixation
Babel (1999)
Children's Film/Millennial Apocalypse
An inane French/Canadian-made children’s film about three cute creatures that come to help a boy stop the resurrection of the Tower of Babel on the eve of the millennium
My Favorite Martian (1999)
Alien Visitor Comedy/TV Series Remake
The big screen remake of the 1960s sitcom about a wacky alien visitor. However, this all of the original’s amusements promptly gets buried under frenetic slapstick and cheap CGI gags
Breakfast of Champions (1999)
Kurt Vonnegut Adaptation
Disappointing adaptation of the Kurt Vonnegut novel from Adam Rudolph that substitutes Vonnegut’s satire for clumsy, ham-fisted farce that never gives us any clear idea what it is satirising
Wild Wild West (1999)
Western Spy Film/TV Series Remake
The big screen remake of the 1960s Western/spy mashup tv series is transformed into an overblown and painfully unfunny Will Smith vehicle that loudly signals it is taking none of itself seriously
Chill Factor (1999)
Action Chase/Chemical Weapons
An inane action film that sets out to copy Speed with Skeet Ulrich and a motormouth Cuba Gooding Jr forced to drive an ice cream truck filled with chemical weapons
Bolt Neck (1999)
High School Frankenstein
The amusing idea of the Frankenstein story relocated to a modern high school – and with no less than later-to-be superstar Ryan Reynolds as the monster
Entrapment (1999)
Millennial Caper Thriller
Caper thriller with the gimmick of being set on the turning of the millennium, this is otherwise an empty-headed exercise where slick marketing triumphs over credible scripting over even connection between the leads
End of Days (1999)
The Devil Returns to Earth at The Millennium/Action Film
Arnold Schwarzenegger takes on The Devil on the eve of the millennium. This is essentially The Omen and one of its ilk having been reworked as a mindless big-budget action and effects movie
Fear Runs Silent (1999)
Backwoods Horrors
Backwoods horror that starts well, keeping its menace ambiguous but collapses into a mishmash of pretensions and amateurish symbolism
The Apartment Complex (1999)
Apartment Building of Weird Tenants
Tobe Hooper makes a film where Chad Lowe becomes the supervisor an apartment building filled with strange tenants. However, Hooper misses the intended black comedy tone by a mile
Baby Geniuses (1999)
Intelligent Baby Conspiracy
Film set around the premise that babies are secretly geniuses and talk in their own language. This makes a beeline for pee and poop jokes and seems to think we should applaud it for the cutsieness of seeing babies doing adult things
Simply Irresistible (1999)
Magical Realism/Magical Cooking
Very silly romantic comedy in a Magical Realist vein where Sarah Michelle Gellar gains magical cooking abilities. Like Water for Chocolate did this better.
Ancient Evil: Scream of the Mummy (1999)
Revived Aztec Mummy
A cheap and tattily made film from regular genre director David DeCoteau concerning a revived Aztec mummy. This had nothing at all to add to the genre.
Idle Hands (1999)
Possessed/Disembodied Hand
Surely the first slacker horror film in which teenager Devon Sawa’s hand becomes possessed. A comedy that feels as though it should have been a lot funnier than it ends up being on screen
From Dusk Till Dawn 2: Texas Blood Money (1999)
Bank Robbers vs Vampires
The first of two video-released sequels to From Dusk Till Dawn, this spins the premise to have a group of robbers at siege from police inside a bank vault as they are attacked by vampires
Eye of the Beholder (1999)
Psycho-Sexual Thriller
A strange thriller in the Basic Instinct-mold with surveillance expert Ewan McGregor obsessed with tracking serial killer Ashley Judd, while haunted by the imaginary companion of his daughter
Eternal Revenge (1999)
Woman Takes Revenge on Men
A bland Canadian police procedural with detective Alexandra Paul investigating a woman who is killing the men who bullied and harassed her
The King and I (1999)
Animation
Don Bluth conducts animated remake of the classic Rodgers and Hammerstein musical memorably incarnated with Yul Brynner. Now the story comes with the addition of fantasy elements
Erotic Possessions (1999)
Erotica/Ghostly Possession
An erotic film in which Shauna O’Brien is possessed by the spirit of an actress from the 1940s who sets out to win the big role she missed out on in her previous life
Bicentennial Man (1999)
Robot Gains Self-Awareness/Isaac Asimov Adaptation
Isaac Asimov may not have been the best science-fiction writer ever but his stories buzzed with challenging ideas. In the hands of Chris Columbus, one of Asimov’s robot stories is reduced to mawkish sentimentalism
The New Adventures of Pinocchio (1999)
Living Puppet Boy
Sequel to the 1996 CGI The Adventures of Pinocchio, this is a shabby and drearily made piece of filler that unimaginatively shuffles around the basic elements of the first film without making an effort at all
Dreamtrips (1999)
Virtual Reality Dreamscapes
A Virtual Reality film that came out the same year as The Matrix and prefigures the dreamscape themes of Inception. Despite the possibilities, this has a dreary pace that very nearly approaches falling asleep
The Rage: Carrie 2 (1999)
Telekinetic Teen
Misguided attempt to make a sequel to Carrie, this reduces that film’s cry of the downtrodden to petty teen bitcheries, while the psychic eruptions are absurd, the complete antithesis of anything Brian De Palma directed
The All New Adventures of Laurel & Hardy in “For Love or Mummy” (1999)
Two Idiots vs a Mummy
Bizarre effort in which actors play Laurel and Hardy who are engaged in a comedic caper against a mummy. The film is all excruciating knockabout slapstick
Universal Soldier: The Return (1999)
Undead Super-Soldiers/Action
Sequel to Roland Emmerich’s Universal Soldier, this brings back Jean-Claude Van Damme but otherwise substitutes a brain dead plot that has him facing an evil A.I.
Deal of a Lifetime (1999)
Pact with the Devil Comedy
Incredibly unfunny comedy in which a teenager sells his soul to the Devil. As The Devil, Kevin Pollak lets all stop loose in a mind-bogglingly over-the-top performance
Dudley Do-Right (1999)
Cartoon in Live-Action
A live-action film adaptation of the old animated tv show with Brendan Fraser in the title role as a bumbling mountie. This drowns in excruciating slapstick and one-dimensional pantomime caricatures
The Bare Wench Project (1999)
Softcore Blair Witch Spoof
Following the success of The Blair Witch Project, this was an excruciatingly lame softcore parody with a group of girls tramping in the woods finding almost any excuse to undress and conduct sex-related takes on Blair Witch
The Haunting (1999)
Haunted House
The original 1963 version of The Haunting was a masterpiece of unseen psychological horrors. This, in which all of the psychological horrors are replaced by loud and unsubtle CGI bombast, is one of the worst remakes of all time