The Tattooist (2007)
Cursed Tattoos
Incredibly tepid New Zealand horror film about an American tattooist who unleashes evil forces after he appropriates Samoan cultural tattoos
Films of 2007
30,000 Leagues Under the Sea (2007)
Jules Verne Modernisation
The Asylum conduct their cheap version of the Jules Verne novel, so cheap it doesn’t even look like they went to sea or underwater to film. Here the oft-filmed Verne story has been modernised
Flight of Fury (2007)
Action/Hi-Tech Fighter Plane Theft
A blatant copy of the Clint Eastwood film Firefox where Steven Seagal is sent to retrieve a hi-tech stealth bomber that has been stolen by a rogue colonel
The Number 23 (2007)
Numerological Obsession and Paranoia/Reality Bender
Demented Joel Schumacher film in which Jim Carrey sees occurrences of the number 23 everywhere and finds his life is being predicted by a book. Featuring one of the most absurd scripts ever written
Highlander: The Source (2007)
Immortal Quest
The fifth of the Highlander films. It is hard to believe people could actually make a film worse than Highlander II but this is akin to Edward D. Wood Jr on a multi-million dollar budget
Nympho Libre (2007)
Mexican Wrestling Pornographic Parody
Following the release of Nacho Libre, we had this parody – a porn film about lucha libre (Mexican masked wrestlers), an idea that in practice ends up about as random and lame as it sounds
Epic Movie (2007)
Parodies of Various Films
Probably the worst of Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer witless and painfully unfunny films – this just consists of a series of vulgar gags run over a bunch of scenes from films that came out in the last twelve months
Alvin and the Chipmunks (2007)
Singing Chipmunks
The squeaky helium-voiced Chipmunks are brought to life via CGI in this live-action film, featuring the chipmunks causing chaos, cracking smart-ass one-liners and lots of pee and poop jokes. The results are excrutiating
Postal (2007)
Videogame Adaptation/Bad Taste Satire
Another Uwe Boll videogame adaptation, a satire where Zack Ward sets out on a shooting spree. Boll sets out to offend as many people as possible but somehow forgets to make any of it funny
Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon Movie Film for Theaters (2007)
Gonzo Animation
Film spinoff of the cult animated tv show. This feels like a film overtaken by the effort of trying to be surrealistic, wacky, scatological etc more than it is ever a film that creates gag that are funny
Metamorphosis (2007)
Modern-Day Elizabeth Bathory
A Countess Bathory film actually made by Hungarians (the area where Bathory lived historically) but this promptly heads into extremely bad movie territory