The Adventurer: The Curse of the Midas Box (2014)

The Adventurer: The Curse of the Midas Box (2014) poster
Rating: ★★
Victorian Young Adult Adventure

Yet another adaptation of a series of Young Adult fantasy books that failed to fly. The idea of an Indiana Jones-type adventure set in Victorian England holds promise but the film only sporadically manages to let the adventure fly

The Mysterious Island (2012)

The Mysterious Island (2010) poster
Rating: ★★
Desert Island Survival/Time Warp

About the ninth film version of Jules Verne’s desert island survival story. This doesn’t add the giant animals/insects other versions do, although we still get a number of wild sf elements the original book never had. Problem though is that the film never adds enough to make proceedings very interesting

The Pirate Movie (1982)

The Pirate Movie (1982) poster
Rating: ★★
Gonzo Pirate Musical

Widely rididculed attempt to market Gilbert & Sullivan’s Pirates of Penzance as a teen pop film by way of The Blue Lagoon. A mind-spinning film that seems to have no limit on how silly it is prepared to be, including numerous anachronistic contemporary pop culture in-jokes and fourth-wall breaking gags

Prisoners of the Sun (2013)

Prisoners of the Sun (2013) poster
Rating: ★½
Egyptian Tomb-Raiding Adventure/Ancient Astronauts

The director of Battlefield Earth teams up with Uwe Boll to deliver a sub-Indiana Jones adventure about venturing into an Egyptian pyramid in search of Ancient Astronauts. The tomb raider cliches are so tired and creaky that the film fails to generate any excitement

The Illusionauts (2012)

The Illusionauts (2012) poster
Rating: ★½
Animation/Adventures Inside an Author's Imagination

A Peruvian children’s animated film about a device that allows people to enter an author’s imagination. This mostly has children having adventures in a facsimile of Jules Verne

Mysterious Island (2005)

Mysterious Island (2005) poster
Rating:
Desert Island Survival/Giant Animals

Hallmark tv mini-series adaptation of Jules Verne’s desert island drama featuring no less than Patrick Stewart as Captain Nemo. This sinks badly amid incredibly shoddy giant animal digital effects

Brenda Starr (1989)

Brenda Starr (1989) poster
Rating:
Girl Reporter Comic-Strip Adaptation

Disastrous Brooke Shields starring film adaptation of the famous comic-strip about a girl reporter. Nobody involved is taking the show seriously and everything is blown into camp farce.

Crystal Skulls (2014)

Crystal Skulls (2014) poster
Rating:
Alien Artefacts/Disaster Movie

Syfy Channel film that mashes the disaster movie together with Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. The result is peculiarly unsatisfying either as disaster movie or the tomb raiding adventure we expect

The Curse of King Tut’s Tomb (2006)

The Curse of King Tut's Tomb (2006) poster
Rating:
Egyptian Archaeology Adventure

TV mini-series that turns the discovery of Tutankamun’s tomb into an Indiana Jones adventure. But everything is played with a constant barrage of one-liners and action sequences so silly you can’t take any of the show seriously

The Curse of the Mayans (2017)

The Curse of the Mayans (2017) poster
Rating:
Mayan Temple/Alien Artefacts

Film about an expedition through the jungles of the Yucatan to investigate a Mayan pyramid that is revealed to contain alien artefacts. This ventures well inside wacky fringe science theories

The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor (2008)

The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor (2008) poster
Rating:
Revived Mummy/Chinese Adventure

The third of the Brendan Fraser Mummy films that feels like it has no point other than to steal $10 from your hand and give you a bucket of content free mental popcorn in return

Tarzan the Ape Man (1981)

Tarzan the Ape Man (1981) poster
Rating:
Softcore Tarzan Adaptation

Tarzan turned into a tedious softcore work designed to highlight the talent-free Bo Derek in a state of undress. This directly remakes the 1932 Johnny Weissmuller film – the original was an adventure classic, this is just an expensive nudie film

Journey 2: The Mysterious Island (2012)

Journey 2: The Mysterious Island (2012) poster
Rating:
Jules Verne Adaptation/Island of Giant Fauna

Sequel to Journey to the Center of the Earth, a supposed adaptation of Jules Verne’s Mysterious Island and a consistently silly, nonsensical film that operates at the level of a children’s cartoon

Journey to the Center of the Earth (2008)

Journey to the Center of the Earth (2008) poster
Rating:
Underground Adventures/The Asylum Mockbuster

A mockbusters from The Asylum made to coincide with the big-budget Brendan Fraser film. Resemblance to the Jules Verne book fairly much ends at the title

Around the World in 80 Days (2004)

Around the World in 80 Days (2004) poster
Rating:
Jules Verne Comedy Adaptation

Jules Verne’s classic adventure novel is turned into a comedy vehicle for Jackie Chan. One of Chan’s biggest flops, an overblown turkey packed with celebrity cameos and replacing Verne’s adventure with incredibly unfunny slapstick

Allan Quatermain and the Lost City of Gold (1986)

Allan Quatermain and the Lost City of Gold (1986) poster
Rating: ½
Lost City Adventure

This is a sequel to Cannon Films’ excruciating camp version of King Solomon’s Mines. Richard Chamberlain and Sharon Stone are back. This is a marginal improvement but far from a good film

The Hunters (2013)

The Hunters (2013) poster
Rating: ½
Quest for Fairytale Artefacts

The premise of a group of adventurers seeking artifacts from fairytales has mild possibilities but is given zero conviction by anybody involved. A sub-Indiana Jones adventure that was made as a tv pilot

King Solomon’s Mines (1985)

King Solomons Mines (1985) poster
Rating:
Adventure Film

Cannon Films’ remake of the H. Rider Haggard adventure novel was made to exploit the success of Raiders of the Lost Ark but that does not excuse what an awful film it is where everything is played up for excruciating camp humour

Journey to the Center of the Earth (1988)

Journey to the Center of the Earth (1988) poster
Rating:
Underground Adventures

Ostensibly as a teen version of the Jules Verne novel made by Cannon Films. However, this started under one director and finished under another with totally incomprehensible results