Perfect Strangers (2003)

Perfect Strangers (2003) poster
Rating: ★★★
Abduction Thriller/Ambiguous Ghost

Very strange New Zealand-made film that starts out seeming to be an abduction thriller and then turns into an even stranger ghost story that we cannot be sure is happening or all in the heroine’s imagination

Phone (2002)

Phone (2002) poster
Rating: ★★★
Korean Ghost Story/Haunted Phone Calls

South Korean jump aboard the Ringu phenomenon about a series of haunted phone calls that works well through a clever ending

Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl (2003)

Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl (2003) poster
Rating: ★★½
Pirate Fantasy Swashbuckler

Enjoyably tongue-in-cheek pirate swashbuckler based on the Disney theme park that proved an enormous hit and spun off a series of sequels, as well as giving Johnny Depp one of his iconic roles

Rectuma (2003)

Rectuma (2003) poster
Rating: ★★★
Giant Rampaging Ass/Bad Taste Parody

The sort of film that might make Troma radioactive green with envy they didn’t make it concerning a giant rampaging ass. Mind-boggling and willing to be stupid and in frequent bad taste

Riverworld (2003)

Riverworld (2003) poster
Rating:
All of Humanity Resurrected on an Alien Planet

The first adaptation of Philip Jose Farmer’s series of novels where every person who ever lived is resurrected on an alien planet is given an abysmal treatment as a tv movie that ditches and rewrites major aspects of the books

Running on Karma (2003)

Running on Karma (2003) poster
Rating: ★★★
Man Who Can See Past Lives

The collaboration of Hong Kong directors Wai Ka Fai and Johnnie To have resulted in some utterly deranged films. This is a madcap one with Andy Lau as a bodybuilding Buddhist monk who can see people’s past lives

Save the Green Planet (2003)

Save the Green Planet (2003) poster
Rating: ★★½
Man Imprisoned By Someone Who Insists He is an Alien

A bizarre South Korean comedy about a businessman who is imprisoned by a possibly crazed man who insists that he is an alien. Things sit in an absurdly funny ambiguity. Later remade by Yorgos Lanthimos as Bugonia

Sinbad: Legend of the Seven Seas (2003)

Sinbad: Legend of the Seven Seas (2003) poster
Rating: ★★
Arabian Nights Adventure/Animation

DreamWorks animated Sinbad adventure by the numbers that seems to go out of its way to tell a Sinbad story divorced of its Islamic cultural background

Spy Kids 3-D: Game Over (2003)

Spy Kids 3-D: Game Over (2003) poster
Rating: ★★
Adventures Inside a Videogame

The third in the series is no longer even a Spy Kids film but a Virtual Reality videogame film. Robert Rodriguez has some fun creating the virtual worlds but the parody that the other films engaged in is missing

Starship Troopers 2: Hero of the Federation (2003)

Starship Troopers 2: Hero of the Federation (2004) poster
Rating: ★★
War with Aliens/Alien Body Snatchers

Passable video-released Starship Troopers sequel the heads more in the direction of a body snatchers film. Directed by Phil Tippett

A Tale of Two Sisters (2003)

A Tale of Two Sisters (2003) poster
Rating: ★★½
Korean Ghost Story

A South Korean ghost story that achieves quite a degree of spookiness, albeit influenced by the Japanese Ring phenomenon, although things fall apart at a confusing twist ending

Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines (2003)

Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines (2003) poster
Rating:
Time-Travelling Killer Androids

After the highs of James Cameron’s first two Terminator films, this was a crashing disappointment. Schwarzenegger is back but his performance has become self-parody and the uninspired action sequences are accompanied by some terrible effects

The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (2003)

The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (2003) poster
Rating: ★★★
Backwoods Brutality

A remake of Tobe Hooper’s landmark classic that presaged a host of inferior 70s/80s horror remakes throughout the 2000s/10s. What we have is now a different film although not entirely an uninteresting one

Time of the Wolf (2003)

Time of the Wolf (2003) poster
Rating: ★★
Social Collapse

Michael Haneke has risen to great acclaim in recent years; this is one of his earlier works – a slow Tarkovsky-esque work that seems set in a future that is collapsing at the edges. Haneke is a fascinating talent but this is a bit too vague and well free of anything actually happening for me

Timeline (2003)

Timeline (2003) poster
Rating:
Time Travel/Michael Crichton Adaptation

Michael Crichton adaptation that flopped at the box-office. Crichton tells a story about time travel to the Mediaeval period where he spends a good deal of time researching the era. The film ditches all of this to make no more than an historical film with an SF gimmick

Tintin and I (2003)

Tintin and Me (2003) poster
Rating: ★★★
Documentary About Tintin's Creator

Documentary about Tintin creator Hergé based on audio recordings he made in the 1970s

The Triplets of Belleville (2003)

The Triplets of Belleville (2003) poster
Rating: ★★★★
Gonzo Animation

Splendidly original and completely off the wall work of stylised animation from Sylvain Chomet

Undead (2003)

Undead (2003) poster
Rating: ★★★
Zombie Splatter and Alien Abductions

Appealingly quirky homemade zombie film that launched the career of Australia’s Spierig Brothers. The two demonstrate a considerable inventivity when it comes to the visual and makeup effects, which they created all themselves

The Uninvited (2003)

The Uninvited (2003) poster
Rating: ★★
South Korean Ghost Story

One of the spate of South Korean ghost stories that came out in 2000s. While made with undeniable directorial style, the two hour running time drags and the plot is often unclear what is happening

Willard (2003)

Willard (2003) poster
Rating: ★★
Man Befriends Rats

James Wong and Glen Morgan, the duo behind Final Destination, remake the 1971 film about a man and his rats. However, this is set in a stylised 1940s world with a caricatured performance from Crispin Glover that causes the film to lack any credibility

X2 (2003)

X2 (2003)
Rating: ★★★
Comic-Book Superheroes

Bryan Singer’s immediate sequel to X-Men, this ups the number of new mutant characters, although only sporadically manages to kick in with the spectacular superheroic action sequences the first film had