A for Andromeda (2006)
Messages from Space
A tv movie remake of a classic 1960s BBC serial where astronomers pick up messages from space that gives instructions for the construction of a body for themselves
Films of 2006
Aachi & Ssipak (2006)
Demented Korean Anime
South Korean anime that is set in a future world where people are obsessed with shit. This comes with a demented energy and a filthy-mindedness that is determined to outrage
The Abandoned (2006)
Haunted Farmhouse
Spanish film about a woman travelling to her family home on the Russian steppes that creates a very haunted atmosphere. On the other hand, the twist ending has borrowed too much M. Night Shyamalan
Abominable (2006)
Bigfoot Film
This offers the novelty of a Bigfoot film by way of Hitchcock’s Rear Window where wheelchair-ridden witnesses Bigfoot preying on a house of girls. This generates a reasonable degree of tension
Absolute Zero (2006)
Disaster Movie
A Syfy Channel disaster movie based around the scientifically nonsensical idea of the Earth’s pole undergoing a magnetic shift and temperatures being reduced to absolute zero
All the Boys Love Mandy Lane (2006)
Slasher Film
Quite why this received a theatrical release is a major scratch of the head. A slasher film that is slickly put together but beneath that a work of thorough ordinariness
Altered (2006)
Captured Alien
A fine film from The Blair Witch Project co-director Eduardo Sanchez about the tensions among a group of friends who hold a captured alien in their garage that then begins to affect them
Android Apocalypse (2006)
Human-Android Relations
A variation on The Defiant Ones with a human and an android chained together but this fails to find anything to say either about androids or prejudice
The Ant Bully (2006)
Animation/Boy Reduced to Ant Size
An animated film about a child who is cruel to ants only to be magically reduced down to their size and then have to become their saviour against an exterminator
Apocalypto (2006)
Mayan Culture Adventure
Mel Gibson seems to love directing historical spectacles with an emphasis on bloody brutality. Here he creates a bloodthirsty adventure set among the Mayan peoples
Aquamarine (2006)
Mermaid Teen Romantic Comedy
Young Adult fantasy in which two girls befriend a mermaid. A film very much made for teenage girls, bubbly, silly and lightweight
Arthur and the Invisibles (2006)
Miniature Magical World
Lightweight Luc Besson directed children’s fantasy with a young boy shrunken down to miniature size to engage in a series of CGI animated adventures among a race of fairy-like people. Several sequels followed
The Astronaut Farmer (2006)
Man Builds His Own Rocket
The Polish Brothers are a greatly underrated force in US filmmaking. Here they make a fine film with Billy Bob Thornton as an everyday farmer who decides to build and launch his own space rocket
Automaton Transfusion (2006)
Zombie Film
Despite a title that resembles more a 1990s killer cyborg film, this is actually a zombie film. Made soon into the mid-2000s zombie revival, this is driven more by fannish enthusiasm and copious gore than anything else
Azur and Asmar (2006)
Animation/Arabian Fairytale
Next to Hayao Miyazaki, Michel Ocelot is the greatest animators of all time but one of the least widely recognised. Here he conducts a beautifully made Arabian fairytale
Bambi II (2006)
Disney Animation/Talking Animals
One of the better video-released Disney sequels churned out during the 90s/00s, this finds some of the innocence of the original even if it never scales the same heights
Barbie in the 12 Dancing Princesses (2006)
Animation/Barbie Fairytale
Another animated Barbie film that leaves you quite certain that every problem in life can be solved with a positive upbeat ditty
Barbie Mermaidia (2006)
Animation/Fairy Barbie Visits the Mermaid Kingdom
Seventh of the animated Barbie films, spinoff of the earlier Barbie Fairytopia, all delivered in sugary upbeat sentiments amid pastel colour schemes that would look eye-poppingly psychedelic if one were high
Barnyard (2006)
Animation/Talking Animals
An incredibly silly animated film set around the antics of talking barnyard animals. Directed by comedy writer Steve Oedekerk, this is almost entirely centred around gags involving animals doing parodies of human things
Basic Instinct 2 (2006)
Psycho-Sexual Thriller
Sequel to Basic Instinct made fourteen years later. Sharon Stone vamps her way across the screen but the heated sexuality of the original has been watered down to a lukewarm whimper
The Beach Party at the Threshold of Hell (2006)
Gonzo Post Holocaust
A gonzo post holocaust film that was put out under the National Lampoon label. Beyond having a great title, this represents as close to near-total ineptitude in filmmaking as it is possible to get
Behind the Mask: The Rise of Leslie Vernon (2006)
Slasher Parody/Mockumentary
What starts out as a seeming mockumentary about a serial killer turns into an hilarious deconstruction of the tropes and cliches of the slasher film. Imagine a film like Man Bites Dog crossbred with Scream
Big Bang Love, Juvenile A (2006)
Prison Murder Mystery with Surreal SF Elements
This is one of Takashi Miike’s most incomprehensible films – what appears to be a murder mystery and gay love story set in a prison, along with random SF elements
Black Christmas (2006)
Girl's Dormitory Slasher
Another in the mid-2000s fad for 1970s remakes. This revives what has been cited as the first slasher film but throws most of the original out and turns the rest into a gore-drenched slasher film
The Black Hole (2006)
Black Hole & Electrical Monster Amok
Of all the concepts in physics, the wildest of these is the black hole. It seems highly disappointing that this set out to be a film about a black hole but all we get is a film about an electrical monster amok
Black Sheep (2006)
Killer Mutant Sheep/Splatter Comedy
An enthusiastically gore-drenched New Zealand comedy about mutant sheep, this favourably harkens back to the heyday of Peter Jackson’s early splatter films
Blackwater Valley Exorcism (2006)
Demonic Possession/"True Story"
In the aftermath of the huge success of The Exorcism of Emily Rose, this was another supposedly true account of an exorcism. Made on a low-budget, this fails to surmount the cliches of The Exorcist
Bon Voyage (2006)
Tourists in France Psycho-Thriller
British tv mini-series reminiscent of And Soon the Darkness about an English couple who have their children abducted by sinister strangers while holidaying in France. From the director of Ginger Snaps
The Bothersome Man (2006)
Afterlife Black Comedy
A very black Norwegian comedy in which a man who committed suicide wakes up in an afterlife very much like this world but where everyone suffers from a maddening blandness
Brand Upon the Brain! (2006)
Surreal Silent Movie Melodrama
Another of Guy Maddin’s silent movie pastiches, all shot in a deadpan style throwing together a hilariously convoluted madcap plot involving child detectives, mad scientists and spy capers
The Breed (2006)
Killer Dogs
Produced by Wes Craven and directed by his assistant director, this features a group of twentysomethings led by Michelle Rodriguez trapped on an island with a horde of killer dogs
Broken (2006)
Abduction and Torture
Highly effective British venture into the Torture Porn fad made not long after the successes of Saw and Hostel. A brutal and harrowing tale about women kept prisoner in the woods that travels to some grim and gore-drenched extremes
Bug (2006)
Disturbed Psychology and Paranoia
One of the last films from William Friedkin, an astonishingly deranged descent into paranoia and madness, featuring an alarming performance from a young, unknown Michael Shannon
Bugmaster (2006)
Wandering Exorcist/Manga Adaptation
Akira director/creator Katsuhiro Otomo returns with this live-action manga adaptation about a wandering exorcist. Very different to any of Otomo’s anime, this is much quieter and rooted in Japanese folklore but has some undeniably way out scenes
The Butterfly Effect 2 (2006)
Alternate Timelines
The Butterfly Effect was not a film set up for a sequel but we get one here anyway with a different person flipping back in time to change his rather dull and uninteresting life
Candy Stripers (2006)
Bimbo Alien Body Snatchers
Throwback to the 1950s SF film where alien body snatchers take over the nurses of a hospital. This fails to find the right cheesily absurd tone needed
Cars (2006)
Pixar Animation/Talking Vehicles
Winning animated film from Pixar based around the appealingly original idea of vehicles having personalities. The idea is spun out with considerable wit and sophistication. Two sequels followed.
Cashback (2006)
Youth Can Freeze Time
Quite magical debut film that showed great promise for director Sean Ellis in its unique premise about a bored supermarket employee on the night shift who appears able to freeze time
Caved In (2006)
Giant Bugs Underground
One of the spate of underground horror films that came out in 2005 including The Descent and The Cave. This is a B-budget wannabe obviously shot in a studio. The addition of giant beetles takes it into the cheesily ridiculous
Charlotte’s Web (2006)
Talking Barnyard Animals
Charlotte’s Web gets the Babe treatment and is turned into a live-action film with CGI barnyard animals and name actors. Here the enormous charms of the original are replaced by cute and mawkish cues
Children of Men (2006)
Infertile Future
Alfonso Cuaron film set in a near-future afflicted by an epidemic of infertility. Cuaron’s depiction of a dystopian world comes with a richness of casually layered detail that makes for a stark and powerful film
Click (2006)
Remote Control to Life Comedy
An Adam Sandler comedy in which he is an ordinary family man who is given a magical remote control that allows him to pause and fast forward his way through the boring bits of his life
Cold Blood (2005-2006)
Serial Killer Thriller
One of the best copies of The Silence of the Lambs, a British tv mini-series in which police must seek the help of imprisoned serial killer Matthew Kelly, who delivers a great performance in the role
The Covenant (2006)
Teen Male Witches
Ridiculous film from the perpetually awful Renny Harlin about teen male witches that feels like a gender-swapped version of The Craft cast with pretty boys and directed amid absurdly overblown effects
Creepshow III (2006)
Horror Anthology
A third entry in the Creepshow series but made without the involvement of George Romero (or Stephen King). This tries to give more of the same but is abysmally made on all counts
Curious George (2006)
Animation/Mischievous Monkey
An animated film based on a popular series of children’s books about a mischievous monkey. Amiable but a film mostly intended for the pre-school set
The Curse of King Tut’s Tomb (2006)
Egyptian Archaeology Adventure
TV mini-series that turns the discovery of Tutankamun’s tomb into an Indiana Jones adventure. But everything is played with a constant barrage of one-liners and action sequences so silly you can’t take any of the show seriously
The Da Vinci Code (2006)
Secret History of Christianity/Historical Conspiracy
Ron Howard directed film version of Dan Brown’s best-selling book. This is historical nonsense woven into a fancifully absurd conspiracy theory where Howard does no more than offer an illustrated version of the book
Date Movie (2006)
Romance Movie Parody
The first film from Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer, a parody of a various romance movies. The duo went on to make some of the excruciating and unfunny comedies of the next decade
Day Watch (2006)
Night Watch Sequel/Supernatural War
Timur Bekmambetov’s sequel to Night Watch comes with a much better budget and the same wild visuals, although is slightly the lesser film
The Dead Girl (2006)
The Women Affected By a Serial Killer
Karen Moncrieff directs a strong and powerful drama that tells five stories of the women whose lives are affected by a serial killer. The film has an amazing ensemble cast who deliver sterling performances
Deadly Skies (2006)
Asteroid Collision
Very low-budget film about an impending asteroid collision. Possibly the first LGBT disaster movie depending on which version you see
Death Note (2006)
Notebook with Killing Powers
Uniquely original Japanese horror film adapted from a manga concerning a book that kills anyone whose name is written in it. This has spawned several sequels and an American remake. The show is stolen by the supremely weird Kenichi Matsuyama
Death Note: The Last Name (2006)
Notebook with Killing Powers
The second of the Japanese Death Note films, released almost back-to-back with the first. This is an even better film than its predecessor, delighting in the twists and turns in the games as Light and his nemesis L outwit each other
Death of a President (2006)
The Assassination of George W. Bush Mockumentary
Mockumentary that caused outrage at the time in depicting the assassination of then-sitting US President George W. Bush. This does not hold back in some damning political punches
Deja Vu (2006)
Time Travel
Tony Scott directed time travel film with Denzel Washington viewing and then entering into events of the past in an effort to stop a terrorist bombing. Action driven as you might expect with Jerry Bruckheimer as producer
Desperation (2006)
Stephen King Adaptation/Possessed Sheriff
Halfway reasonable Stephen King adapted tv mini-series. This has been placed in the directorial hands of King’s worst adapter Mick Garris who at least holds his worst tendencies in check
The Devil’s Chair (2006)
Demonic Portal in an Abandoned Asylum
Solid offering from the increasingly underrated Adam Mason that takes more than a few leaves from Hellraiser with a ghostsbusting team investigating occult happenings in an abandoned asylum
DOA: Dead or Alive (2006)
Videogame Adaptation/Combat Tournament
Videogame adaptation that emerges as a conceptual combination of Charlie’s Angels (2000) – a trio of girls, in kickass poses and jaw-droppingly scanty costumery – and Mortal Kombat
Dr. Dolittle 3 (2006)
Teenager That Can Speak to Animals
Sequel to the Eddie Murphy Dr Dolittle films without Murphy where the title role is inherited by Kyla Pratt as his teenage daughter. The humour is pitched at an excruciating level of inanity
Dracula (2006)
Dracula Adaptation
BBC costume drama version of the Bram Stoker novel, which offers the most radical take on the story of any version made to date, substantially wrenching around many of the familiar characters
Dragon Tiger Gate (2006)
Hong Kong Martial Arts
A Hong Kong martial arts film set among the triad wars that is made with an assured blend of turbo-charged and frequently fantastical CGI-assisted action sequences
Easter Bunny Kill! Kill! (2006)
Psycho Film
Admirably sordid slasher film, an early effort from Chad Ferrin, that quickly gets twisted and comes up with an amusing line-up of lowlifes and an Easter bunny masked killer
Electroma (2006)
Daft Punk Film/Two Robots on a Quest
Full-length film made by the French electronic music duo Daft Punk based around the robot guises the band adopts. Resembles an extended student film and feels exactly like an SF version of The Brown Bunny
Eragon (2006)
Epic Dragon Fantasy
A dragon fantasy adapted from a popular book series that has Lord of the Rings wannabe stamped all over it and only unimaginatively follows in Peter Jackson’s footsteps
Event 16 (2006)
Time Travel
A homemade New Zealand film that attempts to pull an ambitious time travel story that takes place in multiple era with temporal police intervening after a scientist invents a time portal
Evil Bong (2006)
Demonic Marijuana Bong
From Charles Band, this features a possessed marijuana bong that sucks those that imbibe inside into the simulation of a stripper bar where they lose their souls. Several sequels followed.
Exorcism: The Possession of Gail Bowers (2006)
The Asylum Mockbuster/Possession Film
The Asylum’s mockbuster response to the hit of The Exorcism of Emily Rose and actually a far more interesting film. This discovers itself with a go-for-broke trashiness that the horde of Emily Rose imitators balked at
The Fall (2006)
Storyteller's Fable
A fable that was a personal project for Tarsem Singh. A film made for the pure beauty of its visuals, Tarsem eschews visual effects and shoots exotic real world locations to create something exquisitely fantastical
Feast (2006)
Monster Movie
A smartly funny monster movie with various people at siege in a bar and under attack by creatures. This takes great delight in puncturing the cliches of the genre. Two sequels followed.
Fido (2006)
Domesticated Zombies Comedy
Charmingly droll film that posits an alternate version of the 1950s where zombies have been domesticated. This has a perfect sense of mood and admirable deadpan playing by all involved
Final Days of Planet Earth (2006)
Alien Invasion
Darryl Hannah is the queen of a species of body-snatching insects intent on invading Earth. This is a clear winner head and shoulders above any other contenders for the most ridiculous alien invasion work ever made.
Final Destination 3 (2006)
Precognition/Doomed Rollercoaster Crash Survivors
The original creative team behind the Final Destination series, James Wong and Glen Morgan, return for this sequel but only provide a routine series of bizarre novelty deaths following the premonition of a rollercoaster disaster
Flushed Away (2006)
Animation/Talking Rats
Aardman Animation abandon Claymation for regular animation in this story of a pet rat thrown out of his comfort zone down into the sewers. Alas, this only serves to make it just another talking animals animated film
The Fountain (2006)
Mystical Quest for Immortality
Darren Aronofsky’s version of 2001: A Space Odyssey. A cryptic and baffling story that takes place in three different eras, all featuring the same actors. Aronofsky engages in much symbolic interplay but what is happening is a scratch of the head
The 4th Dimension (2006)
Mental Illness and Mathematics
A reality-bending film somewhat influenced by Pi about a withdrawn man who receives a mystery clock that may be able to bend time and space
Frostbite (2006)
Swedish Vampire Film
Swedish film about vampires at a smalltown hospital and vampire pills thought to be party drugs that spread around the town. This is made with an uneven sense of black humour
Garfield: A Tale of Two Kitties (2006)
Lazy Talking Cat
Where the first live-action Garfield film approximated the original comic-strip and its focus on a cat delivering sarcastic lines, this sequel pitches everything down to the level of an inane children’s film
Ghostboat (2006)
Haunted Submarine
Modestly effective tv mini-series about the crew of a British submarine in the 1980s being taken over by the ghosts from a World War II submarine
The Girl Who Leapt Through Time (2006)
Anime/Time Travel
Mamoru Hosoda delivers an appealingly sweet anime about a girl who discovers that she has the ability to travel through time. Based on a popular Japanese Young Adult novel
Glass House: The Good Mother (2006)
Evil Foster Parents Psycho-Thriller
A sequel to The Glass House, this time with different cast or orphaned kids and different evil step-parents. This has the bland feel of a tv movie
The Gravedancers (2006)
Haunting
Mike Mendez has gained a reasonable name as a genre director since the early 2000s. This is one of his earlier works, a venture into the ghost story where three friends are haunted after drunkenly dancing on a grave
The Grudge 2 (2006)
Haunting
Follow-up to The Grudge, the English-language remake of the Japanese horror film. Although original Japanese director Takashi Shimizu is present, this is one of the weaker Ju-on/Grudge films
H.P. Lovecraft’s Cool Air (2006)
H.P. Lovecraft Adaptation
Low-budget director Albert Pyun, best known for his kickboxing cyborg action films, conducts a micro-budgeted adaptation of an H.P. Lovecraft story about a scientist who fends off death by keeping their room chilled
The Hamiltons (2006)
Disturbed Family
An indie horror film about a strange and disturbing family of adult children. The whole film hangs on an interesting mid-film conceptual revelation
Happily N’Ever After (2006)
Animation/Fairytale Deconstruction
Another in the spate of animated fairytale parodies that came out in the wake of Shrek, this subjects Cinderella to an excruciating barrage of pop-culture jokes and one-liners
Happy Feet (2006)
Animation/Talking and Dancing Penguins
George Miller of Mad Max fame makes a motion-capture animated film about a young penguin who sets out to fulfill his dream of tap-dancing. This ends up being a film of unexpectedly winning charms
Hard Luck (2006)
Odd Couple on the Run/Torture Film
Mario Van Peebles directs a beyond ridiculous getaway thriller that turns into Torture Porn. Cybill Shepherd gives a performance that seems determined to trash her image
Hatchet (2006)
Slasher Film Homage
This was Adam Green’s homage to the Friday the 13th series that comes with the virtue of a high level of gore and a sense of humour. This was subsequently spun out to several sequels
The Haunted Airman (2006)
Dennis Wheatley Adaptation/Paranoia and Possible Hauntings
Robert Pattinson (before he was a recognised name) as a convalescing pilot during WWII who is haunted by demonic spiders in an adaptation of a book by occult writer Dennis Wheatley.
Hellboy Animated: Sword of Storms (2006)
Demon Superhero/Animation
The first of two animated Hellboy spinoffs with the live-action actors returning to voice their parts. This is the better of the two animated films, developing a weirdness as it takes Hellboy inside a Japanese spirit realm
The Hills Have Eyes (2006)
Backroads Brutality
Wes Craven’s Backwoods Brutality classic gets a gore-drenched makeover from Alexandre Aja. One of the better amid the 2000s fad for horror remakes where the original is dragged into the modern day in some interesting ways
Hillside Cannibals (2006)
Backroads Brutality/The Asylum Mockbuster
One of the early mockbusters from The Asylum about a in-bred family of cannibals that live in a cave. This was made to come out the same time as the remake of The Hills Have Eyes
Hogfather (2006)
Fantasy Comedy/Terry Pratchett Adaptation
The first in a series of Terry Pratchett Discworld adaptations for tv. This makes the odd choice of adapting one of the more complex and darker of Pratchett’s usually comic books but it works fairly well overall
Hollow Man II (2006)
Invisible Maniac
Utterly generic sequel to Paul Verhoeven’s invisible man film Hollow Man. This one has been so cheaply made that it even recycles its effects from the first film
Hollywoodland (2006)
The Death of TV Superman George Reeves/True Crime
A film based around the suicide of tv’s Superman George Reeves, questioning whether it was a murder. The details are discussed in depth without ever arriving at a solution, while the casting adds up to an absorbing mystery
The Host (2006)
Korean Monster Movie
Bong Joon Ho, the South Korean director of Snowpiercer and Parasite, delivers his own version of a monster movie that certainly comes with a difference
The House Next Door (2006)
Parasitic House
A largely routine haunted house film where Lara Flynn Boyle plays a wife who becomes certain that the house next door is parasitic and preys upon people’s minds
Ice Age 2 (2006)
Animation/Prehistoric Talking Animals
The first in a series of interminable sequels to Blue Sky Studios’ animated prehistoric adventure. Everything has a tediousness that feels as though it is created by a script generating computer
Idiocracy (2006)
Future Ruled by Stupid People
A film about stupid people that for once actually is funny. This a raucous but often biting satire where Luke Wilson wakes up in the year 2025 to find that the stupid have inherited the future