Abattoir (2016)

Abattoir (2016) poster
Rating:
Sinister Small Town/Collector of Murder Rooms

Darren Lynn Bousman is the director most associated with the Saw sequels and its Torture Porn excesses. His other films have been lacking. This comes with one of the most off the wall premises one has seen

The Alchemist Cookbook (2016)

The Alchemist Cookbook (2016) poster
Rating: ★★★
Possible Pacts with the Devil in the Woods

A micro-budgeted production shot in a trailer in the woods with a cast of two that sits in a fascinatingly ambiguous place about whether the central character has sold his soul or gone off his psychiatric meds

Alice Through the Looking Glass (2016)

Alice Through the Looking Glass (2016) poster
Rating: ★★
Alice in Wonderland Sequel

Sequel to the 2010 Tim Burton Alice in Wonderland. This has even less in common with Lewis Carroll’s book sequel than its predecessor did – a total of two scenes. The sets and effects are just pretty eye candy

All Girls Weekend (2016)

All Girls Weekend (2016) poster
Rating: ★★½
Mysterious Happenings in the Woods

This takes its title literally – it is made by a woman director and there are no men on screen. The result is somewhere between The Descent and The Blair Witch Project with an undeniably surprise twist ending

All Superheroes Must Die 2: The Last Superhero (2016)

All Superheroes Must Die 2: The Last Superhero (2016) poster
Rating: ★★
Superhero Mockumentary

Sequel to one of the few original (ie. non comic-book) superhero films of the 2010s. this takes the interesting route of telling it as a investigative tv report into someone killing off all the superheroes

Allegiant (2016)

Allegiant (2016) poster
Rating: ★★
Young Adult Dystopian Future

The Divergent series is a fundamentally implausible scenario for people that think horoscopes are a profound insight into human nature. This is the most interesting of the films and gives us an imaginative future world

Alleluia! The Devil’s Carnival (2016)

Alleluia! The Devil's Carnival (2015) poster
Rating: ★★
War Between Heaven and Hell Rock Musical

Saw series director Darren Lynn Bousman makes a rock musical about a war between a gaudily exotic Heaven and Hell. A full-length expansion of Bousman’s earlier short film

Amerigeddon (2016)

Rating:
Conspiracy Junkie Fantasy of a USA Invaded

Chuck Norris’s son directs spectacularly bad film that acts as a fantasy for every lunatic right wing conspiracy where the UN wants to overthrow the US government and confiscate everybody’s guns

Angry Birds (2016)

Angry Birds (2006) poster
Rating: ★★
Animation/Videogame Adaptation

A film based on a mobile app surely counts as a world first. Mostly this is the equivalent of switching one’s brain off and spending an hour-and-a-half watching cartoons for the single digit age group

Another Evil (2016)

Another Evil (2016) poster
Rating: ★★★
Eccentric Ghost Hunter

Comedy about a man with ghosts in his home who invites in a so-called ‘ghost assassin’ before it becomes increasingly apparent he is completely nuts. Less a horror comedy than an eccentric bromance gone wrong

Antibirth (2016)

Antibirth (2016) poster
Rating: ★★
Stoner Chick's Mutant Impregnation

This has cult midnight hit written over it. It’s a loopy trip into people doing drugs, alien impregnation and government conspiracy that should have been quirky and funny but sort of goes asleep at the wheel

Approaching the Unknown (2016)

Approaching the Unknown (2016) poster
Rating: ★★
Expedition to Mars

This comes with the clear influence of The Martian, telling a similar but more low-key story of a lone astronaut having problems on the way to Mars. This is less about science ingenuity that his fracturing mental state

Arbor Demon (2016)

Arbor Demon (2016) poster
Rating: ★★
Something Lurking in the Woods

Horror film about a couple camping in the woods who are menaced by something lurking outside their tent. A solid film that develops some passable suspense and eventually enters Folk Horror territory

Arrival (2016)

Arrival (2016) poster
Rating: ★★★★★
First Contact with Aliens

Most SF films gloss over the issue of communication with aliens, having them either speaking English or with devices like Universal Translators. This is a superbly intelligent film that grapples with how to communicate with something different

Assassin’s Creed (2016)

Assassin's Creed (2016) poster
Rating: ★★
Videogame Adaptation/Quest Through Past Lives

Adaptation of the popular videogame that is lumbered with the game’s inherently uncinematic premise where people only sit around and watch what has already happened in the past

The Assignment (2016)

The Assignment (2016) poster
Rating: ★★
Hitman Seeks Revenge After Enforced Gender Reassignment Surgery

From Walter Hill, one of the legendary action directors, comes what is either the most edgy or tasteless concepts for a revenge film – Michelle Rodriguez is a hitman who seeks revenge after having gender reassignment surgery forced on him

Attack of the Killer Donuts (2016)

Attack of the Killer Donuts (2016) poster
Rating: ★½
Gonzo Monster Movie

There is a certain genus of films based around coming up with deliberately ridiculous titles. The filmmakers sell you instantly on the film from the title alone but have lavished little care or budget on the actual film

Attack of the Lederhosen Zombies (2016)

Attack of the Lederhosen Zombies (2016) poster
Rating: ★★★
Gonzo Zombie Comedy

One has seen just a few too many wacky titled zombie comedies and this Austrian film seems another wannabe until the climactic scenes where it redeems itself with a completely demented bloodbath

The Autopsy of Jane Doe (2016)

The Autopsy of Jane Doe (2016) poster
Rating: ★★½
Mysterious Corpse on the Morgue Table

The Troll Hunter director Andre Øvredal creates an intense and absorbing mystery about a corpse on a morgue slab and the unsettling spell it exudes on the two coroners examining it

The Bad Batch (2016)

The Bad Batch (2016) poster
Rating: ★★
Future Desert Wasteland of Crazies

Ana Lily Amirpour caught attention with A Girl Walks Home Alone at Night. She makes her second film here, set in a desert prison of cannibals and scavengers, sort of Escape from New York by way of The Burning Man Festival

Batman: Return of the Caped Crusaders (2016)

Batman Return of the Caped Crusaders (2016) poster
Rating: ★★★
Animation/Retro 1960s Batman

Someone figured out Adam West and Burt Ward, Batman and Robin from the 1960s Batman tv series, were still around and put them in this animated film that replicates the look of the show and pays homage to its willful silliness

Batman: The Killing Joke (2016)

Batman The Killing Joke (2016) poster
Rating: ★★★★
Comic-Book Superhero/Animation

Adaptation of the Alan Moore graphic novel, one of the most famous comic-book titles of all time. The notoriously cranky Moore need have no reason to shun this film version, which recreates his work right down to preserving his dialogue and replicating the set-up of individual panels

Batman V Superman: Dawn of Justice (2016)

Batman V Superman Dawn of Justice (2016) poster
Rating: ★★½
DC Comics Superhero Team-Up

It took DC Comics the better part of a decade to catch up with the massive success Marvel Comics are having on screen in crossing their characters over. Zack Snyder comes to the party offering up THE biggest headline double-bill in superherodom

Before I Wake (2016)

Before I Wake (2016) poster
Rating: ★★
Kid Whose Dreams Come to Life

An overlooked Mike Flanagan film about a kid with the ability to bring his dreams to life, this reads like a cross between an A Nightmare on Elm Street copy and the Joe Dante Twilight Zone – The Movie episode

The Belko Experiment (2016)

The Belko Experiment (2016) poster
Rating: ★★★
Office Employees Trapped in a Deadly Elimination Game

Greg (Wolf Creek) McLean directs from a script by James Gunn. The Office by way of Battle Royale as 80 employees are locked in an office building with orders to eliminate one another

The BFG (2016)

The BFG (2016) poster
Rating: ★★★
Roald Dahl Adaptation/Friendly Giant

Steven Spielberg adapts the Roald Dahl story. Despite the film bombing at the box-office, it is one of considerable charms. Spielberg doesn’t produce another E.T. but then he hasn’t delivered another Hook either

Big Bad (2016)

Big Bad (2016) poster
Rating: ★★★
Kids' Adventure vs Werewolf/Bigfoot

An affectionate recreation of 80s-type kids-on-an-adventure films like The Goonies as kids come up against a creature that may be a werewolf or a Bigfoot. Made with humour and a liking for its characters while not forgetting to be scary

Bigfoot Ate My Boyfriend (2016)

Bigfoot Ate My Boyfriend (2016) poster
Rating: ★★★
Bigfoot Comedy

A miracle of $1.98 no-budget film-making, this Bigfoot comedy shouts out its sheer good nature from every pore. It is a film that wears its shortcomings with pride, while the director and cast have a great comic timing

Bigfoot vs Zombies (2016)

Bigfoot vs Zombies (2016) poster
Rating:
Bigfoot Tackles a Zombie Outbreak

Mark Polonia has been producing ultra-cheap horror films since the 1980s and developed a reputation as the worst directors currently working. This does not disappoint on what you expect

Blair Witch (2016)

Blair Witch (2016) poster
Rating: ★★
Found Footage/Backwoods Haunting

The Blair Witch Project was genuinely innovative. It is a surprise that we never saw a string of sequels. Adam Wingard finally does here but at a time when the Found Footage genre feels played out of moves

Bleed (2016)

Bleed (2016) poster
Rating:
Haunted Prison/Backwoods Occult

This feels like mostly a series of horror tropes – ghost hunters with cameras in an abandoned building, backwoods occultists wanting the heroine’s baby – shuffled without originality

Blood on Melies’ Moon (2016)

Blood on Melies' Moon (2016) poster
Rating: ★★
Cosmic Journey Through Film History

Luigi Cozzi’s return to screens after 26 years, a head-scratchingly bizarre effort overloaded with ideas about parallel worlds, cosmic journeys and homage to the early cinema of Georges Melies and others

Bloody Chainsaw Girl (2016)

Rating: ★★★
Chainsaw-Wielding Schoolgirl Battles Mutant Cyborgs

Another of the gonzo Japanese splatter films about a schoolgirl who tries to go about her schoolday while fighting off mutant cyborgs with the chainsaw she carries

The Boy (2016)

The Boy (2016) poster
Rating: ★★
Sinister Possibly Living Doll

There is a certain appeal to the premise – nanny is expected to tend a doll that everyone pretends is real only to discover it might be alive. Director William Brent Bell but he redeems himself in terms of creepy atmosphere only to blow it with a lame twist ending

Cabin Fever (2016)

Cabin Fever (2016) poster
Rating: ★★
Backwoods Horror/Deadly Infection

A remake of Eli Roth’s first film? Why, given that the original only came out 14 years ago, is anybody’s guess. This literally recycles the original’s script but is deaf to its sarcastic humour of the original

Cadence (2016)

Cadence (2016) poster
Rating: ★★
Nightmare Visions/Parallel Reality

For a long time, this effort about a girl experiencing nightmare visions on her family farm doesn’t seem to be doing anything – then gets interesting as it switches to a parallel reality where what happens is mirrored slightly different

Capsule (2016)

Capsule (2016) poster
Rating: ★★½
Astronaut Trapped in Orbit

Buried in a space capsule. A one-man show that takes place entirely in an orbiting space capsule with the stranded British astronaut alternately seeking aid and about to be shot down by both the US and Soviets

Captain America: Civil War (2016)

Captain America: Civil War (2016) poster
Rating: ★★★½
War Between Comic-Book Superheroes

Less Captain America 3 than The Avengers 3 – the entire film has been conceived as a massive superheroic punch-up. The results move with an exhilarating pace, but the Russo Brothers haven’t yet mastered Joss Whedon’s hand with character humour

Capture Kill Release (2016)

Capture Kill Release (2016) poster
Rating: ★★
Found Footage/Couple Plan a Murder

A Canadian-made micro-budgeted Found Footage film about a couple filming themselves as they plan out a murder for the thrill of it – only to fall out in the midst of doing so

Carnage Park (2016)

Carnage Park (2016) poster
Rating: ★★
Human Hunting for Sport

Mickey Keating makes a Backwoods Brutality film that has borrowed a good deal from The Most Dangerous Game about a woman abducted and forced to make a survival run through the desert with her bare hands

Cell (2016)

Cell (2016) poster
Rating: ★★★
Stephen King Adaptation/Cellphone Zombies

Adaptation of the Stephen King novel about zombies created by a cellphone signal. Critically panned but this kicks in with a sensational opening scene and overspills with more fascinating ideas than it has room to deal with

Charlie Charlie (2016)

Charlie Charlie (2016) poster
Rating:
Oracular Game

Charlie Charlie was supposedly an oracular game that made headlines when a satiric site claimed that teenagers were being killed playing it and some news sites took this seriously. This is a pathetic and feeble film made exploiting the game’s five minutes of notoriety

Cinderella Game (2016)

Cinderella Game (2016) poster
Rating: ★★
Deadly Elimination Card Game

Bizarre Japanese copy of Battle Royale by way of American Idol where a group of schoolgirls from a singing competition are trapped on an island where they must play a deadly card game

Clown Kill (2016)

Clown Kill (2016) poster
Rating:
Killer Clown in an Office Building

A British effort where a girl working late in an office building who is stalked by a creepy clown. Made with an incredibly amateurism, this is possibly the worst entry in the killer clown genre

Collateral Beauty (2016)

Collateral Beauty (2016) poster
Rating:
Inspirational Drama/Fantastic Twist

Gigantic flop starring Will Smith and a reasonable cast line-up that has the most ridiculous screenplay ever written. Mostly a positive inspirational drama about grief but does definitely arrive at a bizarre fantastical ending

Colossal (2016)

Colossal (2016) poster
Rating: ★★★
Woman's Actions Are Mimicked by a Giant Monster

Nacho Vigalondo film with a head-scratchingly wacky premise – Anne Hathaway finds that a giant monster mimics her movements. Vigalondo plays this surprisingly seriously and spins it through some appealing twists

Comix: Beyond the Comic Book Pages (2016)

Comix: Beyond the Comic Book Page (2016) poster
Rating:
Comic-Book Documentary

Documentary about the comic-book that ends up trying to address everything and being so hopelessly watered down it feels like an attempt to explain everything to someone who has never read a comic-book before

The Conduit (2016)

The Conduit (2016) poster
Rating: ★★
Deadly Mystery Woman

Modest film about a man who becomes involved with a woman who increasingly appears to be responsible for a series of murders. The director and lead actress create a sense of mystery and fascination about what is happening

The Conjuring 2 (2016)

The Conjuring 2 (2016) poster
Rating: ★★½
Haunting/Possession/"True Story"

If you want a genuinely scary spook show that will make you jump out of your seat, you would not go wrong with this. On the other hand, the Conjuring films with their claims to true stories of peddle superstition and fabricate most of their so-called facts

Criminal (2016)

Criminal (2015) poster
Rating: ★★
Transplanted Memories/Action Film

Everything indicates this should have been a hit – an impressive star line-up, big polished action sequences – only it tanked. Much has been assembled in the service of a hackneyed idea where the memories of an FBI agent are implanted into criminal Kevin Costner

Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon: Sword of Destiny (2016)

Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon Sword of Destiny (2016) poster
Rating:
Flying Swordsmen Fantasy

A massive letdown of the year. A sequel that brings back several of the original cast and gives it to Yuen Wo-Ping to direct but is merely slickly paced, uninspired action that substitutes CGI for the graceful wirework of the original

Cruel Summer (2016)

Cruel Summer (2016) poster
Rating: ★★★
Youths Torture and Kill a Handicapped Boy

Making claim to being based on a true story, this recounts the brutal beating and killing of a handicapped boy by three youths. More social horror than genre horror, this culminates in a horrible and not easy to watch scene

A Cure for Wellness (2016)

A Cure for Wellness (2016) poster
Rating: ★★
Sinister Health Sanatorium

From Gore Verbinski, director of The Ring and the first three Pirates of the Caribbean films, a film about a sinister health sanatorium. A beautiful looking film but it is a long time before we ever find out what is going on

The Curse of Sleeping Beauty (2016)

Rating: ★★
Horror Version of Sleeping Beauty

This offers the promising idea of Sleeping Beauty reworked as a horror film (and set in the modern day). Never as interesting as it sounds in synopsis, this becomes more a Sleeping Beauty-themed haunted house ride

Cyborg X (2016)

Cyborg X (2016) poste
Rating: ★★
Post-Holocaust Cyborg Wars

From Arrowstorm Entertainment, a low-budget company that make highly professional films. Here they have even roped Danny Trejo into playing a role in a passable attempt to replicate a 1990s Albert Pyun post-holocaust cyborg film

The Darkness (2016)

The Darkness (2016) poster
Rating: ★½
Haunting/Native American Demons Awakened

Greg McLean has made an impressive name with the Wolf Creek films and Rogue. In his first US film, he delivers a disappointing and utterly generic haunted suburban house film

Darkweb (2016)

Darkweb (2016) poster
Rating:
Human Bloodsports

This exploits the topical fascination with the darknet in a story ostensibly about making snuff videos for sale there. In actuality, this telescopes down to being no more a variant on The Most Dangerous Game

David Lynch: The Art Life (2016)

David Lynch: The Art Life (2017) poster
Rating: ★★★
David Lynch Documentary

David Lynch is the king of weird cinema from works like Eraserhead to Twin Peaks. In this documentary, a 70-year-old Lynch sits in his art studio and in a very laidback manner reflects on his process and tells us his life story

Day of Reckoning (2016)

Day of Reckoning (2016) poster
Rating: ★★½
Apocalyptic Invasion of Demonic Creatures

Halfway reasonable effort from the usual creative dead zone of the made-for-Syfy Channel film concerning the apocalyptic emergence of hordes of demonic creatures

Deadman Apocalypse (2016)

Deadman Apocalypse (2016) poster
Rating:
Post-Holocaust Action Underground

Despite the hope that this might have been an adaptation of DC’s disembodied superhero, this is no more than a post-apocalyptic adventure that takes place in tunnels only about three feet high, including the car chases

Deadpool (2016)

Deadpool (2016) poster
Rating: ★★★★
Marvel Comics Superhero

Maybe the smartest and wittiest of the modern Marvel Comics adaptations, this takes every opportunity to deflate its own seriousness, not to mention frequently breaks the fourth wall with side-splitting results

Demon Tongue (2016)

Demon Tongue (2016) poster
Rating: ½
Paranormal Investigators/Possession

One hoped this might have taken the approach of featuring a demonically possessed tongue but more mundanely uses tongue as meaning language. In reality, this is a poorly made film about a team of ghostbusters searching a haunted bar

Director’s Cut (2016)

Director's Cut (2016) poster
Rating: ★★★
Meta-Fiction/Film Gets Invaded by a Psycho Fan

A mind-bogglingly meta film that starts out as a regular crime thriller before it gets invaded and taken over by psycho fan Penn Jillette who abducts the star and is determined to write himself in as the hero

Doctor Strange (2016)

Doctor Strange (2016) poster
Rating: ★★★½
Marvel Comics Magician Superhero

Scott Derrickson acquits himself well taking on one of Marvel’s magician superhero. He replicates well the psychedelic esoterica that gained the comic book a cult following and Benedict Cumberbatch anchors the show perfectly

Dolores (2016)

Dolores (2016) poster
Rating: ★★★½
Model Maker's Miniature House Affects Reality

A model maker is hired to build a miniature of a famous actress’s house but then finds the model is capable of influencing reality. An ingenious premise that plays out with near-perfection

Don’t Breathe (2016)

Don't Breathe (2016) poster
Rating: ★★
House Breakers Stalked by a Blind Man

This, which is sort of The People Under the Stairs by way of Wait Until Dark, was greeted with terms like ‘an instant classic’. It is a well-oiled machine that produces some undeniable jumps but little remains in memory after it is over

Don’t Fuck in the Woods (2016)

Don't Fuck in the Woods (2016) poster
Rating: ★★½
Monster in the Woods/Slasher Homage

This gets the award for the ballsiest title of any horror film of recent While the slasher film of the 00s has become much more chaste, this doesn’t let down on the plentiful nudity. At the same time, it is also a smartly self-aware horror film

Don’t Kill It (2016)

Don't Kill It (2016) poster
Rating: ★★★
Body-Hopping Demon

An enthusiastically full-tilt horror comedy. This draws from the classic The Hidden in its premise of a demon that hops between bodies, possessing the person that kills its previous host. Dolph Lundgren has the time of his life

Don’t Knock Twice (2016)

Don't Knock Twice (2016) poster
Rating: ★★
Old Woman's Supernatural Retribution

Welsh director Caradog James impressed with his previous film The Machine. Here he makes a horror film concerning an urban legend about an old crone haunting those who disturb her, but fails to do anything notable

Door to the Other Side (2016)

Door to the Other Side (2016) poster
Rating: ★★
Haunted House

Haunted house story that is not substantially different from the 7000 on this site. This has some novel twists in that it focuses on an old man afraid to go out of doors who appears to open up a supernatural doorway as he sleeps

Earthtastrophe (2016)

Earthtastrophe (2016) poster
Rating:
Earth Transported to Another Solar System

Syfy Channel disaster movie where Earth is suddenly transported into another Solar System amid cheap effects and an improbable time travel solution is sought to reverse this

Edgar Allan Poe’s Lighthouse Keeper (2016)

Edgar Allan Poe's Lighthouse Keeper (2016) poster
Rating: ★★
Poe Adaptation/Haunted Lighthouse

Adaptation of a story fragment that Edgar Allan Poe left unfinished upon his death. The original (only two pages long) gives little more than a setting but this builds out into an okay period ghost story

Einstein’s God Model (2016)

Einstein's God Model (2016) poster
Rating: ★★★
Scientific Experiment in Contacting the Dead

A conceptually wild film about the use of a device that can contact the dead that winds in the use of Thomas Edison’s spirit phone, modern physics and multiverse theory in something uniquely different

11.22.63 (2016)

11.22.63 (2016) poster
Rating: ★★★
Time Traveller Tries to Prevent the Assassination of JFK/Stephen King Adaptation

Stephen King adapted mini-series in which James Franco finds a mysterious door that leads back to 1960 and sets out to prevent the assassination of President Kennedy

The Emeryville Experiments (2016)

The Emeryville Experiments (2016) poster
Rating:
Sinister Town of Former Asylum Inmates

The premise of a small town inhabited by the former inmates of an asylum, suggests a variant on Poe’s The System of Dr Tarr and Professor Fether. The execution is complete amateurism on every level