Blade Trinity (2004)

Blade Trinity (2004) poster
Rating: ★★★½
Comic-Book Vampire Hunter

Third of the Blade films with Wesley Snipes. As director, series screenwriter David S. Goyer emulates the same exhilarating, kinetic moves that Guillermo Del Toro infused the second film with, while the script zings with his wryly cynical dialogue

Bloodlust Zombies (2011)

Bloodlust Zombies (2011) poster
Rating: ★★
Zombie Film

Yet another zombie film. This one headlines porn star Alexis Texas in a regular acting role. Low-budget and tame on the gore front but with some often wryly amusing characterisations

Casino Royale (1967)

Casino Royale (1967) poster
Rating:
James Bond Spoof

During the James Bond craze of the 1960s, the only Ian Fleming novel not owned by Albert R. Broccoli was turned into a giant farce. The film has five directors, a host of stars (including three playing Bond) and is an incoherent mess

Cowboy Bebop: The Movie (2001)

Cowboy Bebop: The Movie (2001) poster
Rating: ★★
Anime/Future Bounty Hunters

The feature film spinoff of a cult anime tv series about intergalactic bounty hunters who in the plot here are on the track of a stolen nanotech virus

The Crazies (1973)

The Crazies (1973) poster
Rating: ★★★★
Madness Inducing Biospill

George Romero’s most underrated film, filled with disturbing images as the population of a town are driven crazy by a bio-weapon spill The first and also the best of a number films on the theme of outbreaks of mass insanity

Dark Island (2010)

Dark Island (2010) poster
Rating:
Mysterious Island/Toxic Cloud Amok

This feels like a mockbuster thrown together to exploit the popularity of the tv series Lost concerning an island haunted by a sinister cloud of smoke. The scenario quickly collapses into absurdity.

The Face of Fu Manchu (1965)

The Face of fu Manchu (1965) poster
Rating: ★★★½
Super-Villain

The first and best of the series of films featuring Christopher Lee at his ice cold best as the Chinese super-villain Fu Manchu. This was made at the height of the Anglo-horror cycle and employs the production values to superlative regard.

Flash Gordon Conquers the Universe (1940)

Flash Gordon Conquers the Universe (1940) poster
Rating: ★★★
Serial/Space Opera

The third of the Flash Gordon serials, not quite at the heights of the previous two but with a colour and exoticism that was head and shoulders above the other serials of the era

Gas; or It Became Necessary to Destroy the World in Order to Save It (1970)

Gas; or It Became Necessary to Destroy the World in Order to Save It (1970) poster
Rating: ★★★
Hippie Post-Holocaust/Gonzo Satire

Satiric Roger Corman film in which a gas kills everyone in the world over the age of 25. Corman indulges his droll and surreal sense of humour in what amounts to a parody of his own films

The Great Martian War: 1913-1917 (2013)

The Great Martian War 1913-1917 (2013) poster
Rating: ★★★½
War of the Worlds Mockumentary Retelling

A very clever mockumentary retelling of H.G. Wells’ War of the Worlds that ingeniously blends existing WWI war footage with CGI to show soldiers fighting off invading Martian tripods

Highlander: The Search for Vengeance (2007)

Highlander: The Search for Vengeance (2007) poster
Rating: ★★½
Immortal Combat/Anime

The Highlander series conducts an anime variant on the franchise set in a post-apocalyptic future. Co-directed by Yoshiaki Kawajiri of Ninja Scroll fame who adds some highly stylised moves

Inferno (2016)

Inferno (2016) poster
Rating:
Dan Brown Adaptation/Trail of Clues to a Deadly Virus

The third film based on Dan Brown’s Robert Langdon books. This is essentially the same plot as The Da Vinci Code with Tom Hanks following clues to a deadly virus hidden in classic artworks around Europe

The Infinite Worlds of H.G. Wells (2001)

The Infinite Worlds of H.G. Wells (2001) poster
Rating: ★★½
Anthology of H.G. Wells Stories/TV Mini-Series

TV mini-series that adapts six less well known short stories by H.G. Wells into an anthology with Wells as the central character. A couple of good stories, some that never hit the mark

Lara Croft, Tomb Raider: The Cradle of Life (2003)

Lara Croft, Tomb Raider: The Cradle of Life (2003) poster
Rating:
Videogame Adaptation

The first Tomb Raider film was empty-headed but a hit but the series was then killed off by this sequel. Angelina Jolie’s performance is detached from human emotion and the action sequences ludicrous

Mission: Impossible III (2006)

Mission: Impossible III (2006) poster
Rating: ★★★½
Spy/Action Film

For his third outing in the series, Tom Cruise made a smart bet on giving the reins to J.J. Abrams who made his directorial debut and turned in the most enjoyable entry in the series to that point. One of the best moves is in the casting of Philip Seymour Hoffman as the villain of the show

Moonraker (1979)

Moonraker (1979) poster
Rating:
James Bond in Space

The eleventh James Bond film and one that sees that series trying to compete with the success of Star Wars and taking Roger Moore into orbit. One of the most spectacular productions of the series, it is also killed by a cartoonish unserious tone

Nazi Overlord (2018)

Nazi Overlord (2018) poster
Rating: ★★
Nazi Mad Science Experiments/The Asylum Mockbuster

The Asylum’s mockbuster answer to the J.J. Abrams’ produced Overlord concerning GIs on a mission behind enemy lines encountering Nazi mad science. Passably well made for the most part

Nick Fury, Agent of Shield (1998)

Nick Fury, Agent of Shield (1998) video cover
Rating: ★★★
Marvel Comics TV Pilot/Spy Adventure

Way back before Marvel Comics’ extraordinary domination of cinema screens and Samuel L. Jackson’s airing of the role, there was this tv pilot with David Hasselhoff; Although the film has a ridiculed reputation today, David S. Goyer delivers a tongue-in-cheek script filled with side-splitting one-liners

On Her Majesty’s Secret Service (1969)

On Her Majesty's Secret Service (1969) poster
Rating: ★★★½
James Bond Film

The sixth James Bond film where Sean Connery was replaced by Australian model George Lazenby who had never acted before. Lazenby is a disliked Bond but that tends does stand in the way of the fact that this is a fine character-driven Bond film with some of the best action sequences of the series

Patient Zero (2012)

Patient Zero (2012) poster
Rating: ★★
Madness-Inducing Virus Released at a Laboratory

This comes with a good premise – people must escape from a biological containment facility after the release of a virus that turns the infected homicidal. Essentially a low-budget version of The Crazies, this is a film that would have been improved by a studio budget

Postal (2007)

Postal (2007) poster
Rating:
Videogame Adaptation/Bad Taste Satire

Another Uwe Boll videogame adaptation, a satire where Zack Ward sets out on a shooting spree. Boll sets out to offend as many people as possible but somehow forgets to make any of it funny

Rattlers (1976)

Rattlers (1976) poster
Rating:
Killer Snakes

An entry in the 1970s Animals Attack cycle about a small desert town under attack by rattlesnakes

Resident Evil (2002)

Resident Evil (2002) poster
Rating: ★★
Videogame Adaptation/Lab Complex of Zombies

Based on the survival horror videogame, this was the first in a surprisingly popular series of films. It also presaged a major return of the zombie film during the 2000s/10s, even if this only treads where George Romero went better before

Resident Evil: Degeneration (2008)

Resident Evil: Degeneration (2008) poster
Rating: ★★
Anime/Videogame Adaptation

The first in a series of anime films that were produced by Capcom, the creators of the Resident Evil videogames, and intended to run parallel to the live-action films. I was never a big fan of the live-action films. The question is – does Resident Evil work better in the anime format?

Resident Evil: The Final Chapter (2016)

Resident Evil: The Final Chapter (2016) poster
Rating: ★★½
Videogame Adaptation/Post-Holocaust Zombies

The Resident Evil films are designed for people who were introduced to drama via the Xbox, action sequences that can be assembled in random order and where it doesn’t matter what happens. I watched this, the sixth and final entry, with next-to-no enthusiasm but then quite unexpectedly it starts to work

Return of the Living Dead (1985)

Return of the Living Dead (1985) poster
Rating: ★★★★
Zombies/Black Comedy

Spinoff of Night of the Living Dead that emerged from a complicated copyright split with George Romero. Director Dan O’Bannon substitutes black humour to deliver an hilariously different take

Return of the Living Dead III (1993)

Return of the Living Dead III (1993) poster
Rating: ★★★
Zombie Girlfriend

Brian Yuzna’s entry is the only worthwhile effort among the sequels to Dan O’Bannon’s Return of the Living Deadwhere Yuzna adds an original plot about a zombie girlfriend and the film is spiked with perverse imagery

Return of the Living Dead Part II (1988)

Return of the Living Dead Part II (1988) poster
Rating:
Zombie Comedy

Dan O’Bannon’s Return of the Living Dead came with a cheerfully black cynicism that was a wonderfully fresh alternative to George Romero amid the 1980s zombie fad – this sequel has a painfully unfunny lameness that could not sit at more removed extreme to that

Right At Your Door (2006)

Right At Your Door (2006) poster
Rating: ★★½
Dirty Bomb Detonated in L.A.

One of the fear-fraught films made in the aftermath of 9/11, a tense thriller concerning the detonation of a dirty bomb in L.A. and the panic that descends as one man tries to barricade his home

The Satanic Rites of Dracula (1973)

The Satanic Rites of Dracula (1973) poster
Rating:
Contemporary Hammer Dracula Sequel

The eight of Hammer’s Dracula, the second-to-last they would make and the last featuring Christopher Lee. This follows on from the previous film Dracula A.D. 1972 in featuring Dracula in the present day and at least does more with the idea than that film did

Ultraviolet (2006)

Ultraviolet (2006) poster
Rating: ★★★
Dystopian Future Action/Vampire Mutations

Milla Jovovich is a part of a vampire rebel underground in a dystopian future. A film filled with incredible design schemes and action scenes that are as spectacular as they are ridiculously improbable

War of the Worlds 2: The Next Wave (2008)

War of the Worlds 2: The Next Wave (2008) poster
Rating: ★★
Alien Invasion

Sequel to The Asylum mockbuster version. Sequelising H.G. Wells is a daunting prospect and not too surprisingly this throws much of Wells out and creates its own film, which is undercut by a typical Asylum low budget

When Time Becomes a Woman (2012)

When Times Becomes a Woman (2012) poster
Rating: ★★★½
Conversation Between the Last Two People on Earth

How interesting can a film be that consists of nothing more than two people talking? The answer is surprisingly good. Boasting that it is Jordan’s first SF film, this produces an extraordinary series of conceptual reversal twists while never venturing beyond being a man and a woman talking on a beach