Frankenstein (2004)
TV mini-series that tries to conduct a rigorously faithful adaptation of Mary Shelley’s book and largely succeeds apart from some minor changes. On the other hand, none of the period setting or story much comes to life
The Adventures of Taura: Prison Ship Star Slammer (1986)
B-budget director Fred Olen Ray makes a Women in Prison film set in space. Known under several different names, this is another of Olen Ray’s bimbo pictures where he plants tongue well in cheek
Gormenghast (2000)
I enjoyed Mervyn Peake’s Gormenghast books far more than J.R.R. Tolkien. Alas, the sublime texture and eccentricity is completely missing in this BBC tv version, which aims for colourful silliness
The Horror of Party Beach (1964)
A Z movie classic that combines some of the most absurd looking mutant monsters ever created with the era’s fad for beach party movies, including appearances from a wannabe Beach Boys band
Zodiac (2007)
David Fincher’s gripping investigation into the unsolved true-life Zodiac Killer case. Fincher’s stagings are exacting and the mystery he builds intensely absorbing
Tremors II: Aftershocks (1996)
The first of several sequels to the modest hit of Tremors with Fred Ward and Michael Gross repeating their roles, hunting Graboids in Mexico this time. As with the first film, this ably balances suspense, creature effects and a considerable sense of humour
Scoop (2006)
One of the more forgettable Woody Allen comedies with Scarlett Johansson as a journalism student who gets tips from the afterlife
Alien Abduction (2005)
An early film from The Asylum set in a hospital for alien abductees, which director Eric Forsberg evokes with some paranoia and a great ending
28 Weeks Later (2007)
I was cautious about hailing 28 Days Later as a modern classic; this sequel is in fact a much better film. Newcomer director Juan Carlos Fresnadillo draws it out into a series of superbly sustained suspense sequences
The Phantom Planet (1961)
Dull and forgettable space exploration film where an astronaut is stranded on a planet and ends up in a romantic triangle and an alien invasion
Lady Beware (1987)
A tawdry erotic thriller where designer Diane Lane creates a series of sexually provocative window dressings only for her to then become targeted by a psycho stalker
Dracula (2006)
BBC costume drama version of the Bram Stoker novel, which offers the most radical take on the story of any version made to date, substantially wrenching around many of the familiar characters
The Adventures of Ichabod and Mr. Toad (1949)
Likeable entry from the 1940s period when Disney was putting out animated anthologies, this conducts adaptations of The Wind in the Willows and The Legend of Sleepy Hollow
V (1983)
Very popular mini-series during its day (that was followed by a tv series) concerning the alien invasion and occupation of Earth, this has an utter banality that fails on almost every level – as human drama, science and even basic plausibility
Don’t Go Near the Park (1979)
Another of the ‘don’t __’- titled entries of the 1970s. This is a bizarre bad movie about teenage runaways in L.A.’s Griffith Park who fall prey to flesh-eating immortals
Spider-Man 3 (2007)
Last and by general opinion the least of the Sam Raimi-Tobey Maguire Spider-Man films. With three super-villains present, the plot feels as though it is bursting at the seams juggling the various origin stories and ongoing dramas, although Raimi still delivers some solid superheroic action scenes
The Wiz (1978)
Musical modernisation of The Wizard of Oz relocated in New York City with an All-Black cast. Despite a clear budget arrayed, the film lumbers and never much comes to life
Dudley Do-Right (1999)
A live-action film adaptation of the old animated tv show with Brendan Fraser in the title role as a bumbling mountie. This drowns in excruciating slapstick and one-dimensional pantomime caricatures
The Diary of Ellen Rimbauer (2003)
TV movie prequel to the Stephen King tv mini-series Rose Red that tells the story of the building of the house. A lesser work but not without moments of interest
The Fog (2005)
One of the worst among the 2000s fad for remakes of 70s/80s horror films. John Carpenter’s 1980 original has been transformed into a teen horror film where the spookiness collapses into frequently ridiculous shock effects
Roboforce (1988)
A Hong Kong take on RoboCop with Sally Yeh as crimefighting android. Though produced by and also starring Tsui Hark, a very silly slapstick element comes to dominate what are otherwise imaginative action sequences
The Happiness of the Katakuris (2001)
Completely madcap film from Takashi Miike, a black comedy about a family who run a guesthouse where the guests keep dying. This comes replete with musical numbers and Claymation sequences
The Reaping (2007)
Reasonable budgeted film about a series of Biblical plagues being visited upon a rural Louisiana town. An interesting set up that flounders amid a confused script
Category 7: The End of the World (2005)
Sequel to the tv mini-series Category 6: Day of Destruction ups the scale of the super-storm but is also better constructed as a disaster movie
The Care Bears Adventure in Wonderland (1987)
The third of the Care Bears film conducts a crossover with Alice in Wonderland, although it is an adaptation that is liberal in its treatment of Lewis Carroll to say the least
Headspace (2005)
Modest and effective horror film about a teenager who starts to gains expanded mental abilities – but where this also appears to unleash monsters
TMNT (2007)
Animated revival of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, which brings them back to the screen with a satisfyingly gritty edge and a series of kinetic action sequences
The Illusionist (2006)
This came out the same year as The Prestige and has a very similar plot with Edward Norton as a stage magician in 19th Century who may have real powers and the rivalry over a woman
Sunshine (2007)
Danny Boyle and Alex Garland make a big serious SF film about a solar expedition, which works with great scientific rigour until the shows heads off at a tangent and falls apart in the latter third
Hercules (1997)
Disney animated film from the same duo behind Aladdin. As with that film, the Greek myths are subjected to an annoying barrage of hip modern jokes and pop culture references
Frankenstein Meets the Spacemonster (1965)
A film with a bad movie reputation where a NASA android returns to Earth damaged and goes amok where it tackles alien invaders come to Earth to abduct women
Eating Raoul (1982)
Paul Bartel’s black comedy where he and Mary Woronov play a snobby couple who pose as kinksters to lure swingers and then kill them off. all to fund setting up an exclusive restaurant
Disturbia (2007)
A hackneyed rehash of Alfred Hitchcock’s Rear Window where Shia LaBeouf is a teenager on home detention spying with a pair of binoculars who realises that his neighbour might be a serial killer
Pan’s Labyrinth (2006)
Critically acclaimed Guillermo Del Toro film set during the Spanish Civil War where a young girl finds the entrance to a dark realm. This plays like a very dark version of the Narnia films
Meet the Robinsons (2007)
One of the more enjoyable efforts from the mid-2000s dead zone where Disney animation with filled with ideas that left-you scratching your head, this quickly gets demented and emerges like The Jetsons colliding with The Royal Tenenbaums
Dangerous Attraction (1999)
A passable psycho-sexual thriller that copies Fatal Attraction and Basic Instinct with Andrea Roth caught between two men, one of who seems to be stalking her
Cold Creek Manor (2003)
Mike Figgis, the director of Leaving Las Vegas, visits the Backwoods Brutality genre in this Southern Gothic, but despite a top drawer cast, this never does more than stir lukewarm cliches
Chain of Command (2000)
Halfway reasonable action film in which US President Roy Scheider is taken hostage by Taiwanese terrorists who want to use the nuclear launch codes against China. The surprise about the film is how political it is willing to get
Casshern (2004)
Live-action film based on an anime series where the original is built out with a series of of extraordinarily gorgeous over-ornamented visuals set in a strange retro-future world
Black Sheep (2006)
An enthusiastically gore-drenched New Zealand comedy about mutant sheep, this favourably harkens back to the heyday of Peter Jackson’s early splatter films
A Midsummer Night’s Dream (2005)
Under the umbrella title ShakespeareRetold, Shakespeare’s tale of fairy enchantments and romantic mix-ups is reimagined in a modern day British holiday camp
300 (2007)
Zack Snyder’s adaptation of the classic Frank Miller graphic novel about the Greek battle of Thermopylae. In replicating the look of the original’s panels, Snyder pushes what would otherwise be a standard historical film into something extraordinarily stylised and fantastic
Popeye (1980)
Robert Altman’s adaptation of the Popeye comic-strip starring Robin Williams has become widely regarded as a turkey but Altman’s eccentricity makes for a by no means unenjoyable film
The Batman vs. Dracula (2005)
A film spinoff from the animated The Batman tv series, this offers a great title match but proves a disappointment. Moreover, it has to twist comic-book canon to make the plot work
The Shining (1997)
Stephen King expressed dissatisfaction with the way Stanley Kubrick handled his novel and here remakes it as a tv mini-series that adheres more closely to the book. While Kubrick’s film is far better, this is not bad where even the perpetually awful Mick Garris subdues his tendency to overdo everything towards some subtlety
Young Einstein (1988)
Bizarrely surreal comedy directed by and starring Yahoo Serious who plays Albert Einstein as an Australian who discovers surfing and rock
Ghost Rider (2007)
Film adaptation of Marvel Comics’ demon superhero emerges as better than it had the right to be. The risibility of the image of a motorcycle-riding demon hero is made to work through some vivid and way-out effects
Skeletons (1997)
An almost respectable film from David DeCoteau about a journalist uncovering the disappearance of a gay man in a town that eliminates those who do not conform to its wholesome lifestyle
The Eye 2 (2004)
The Pang Brothers are in this author’s opinion some of the finest genre directors in the world. This sequel to their breakout hit The Eye is an even better film that achieves some genuinely haunted moments
Tenacious D in the Pick of Destiny (2006)
Film spinoff of the rock parody act headed by Jack Black. This emerges like i>The Blues Brothers recast with Cheech and Chong and delivers some occasionally surreal and amusing gags
Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer Part II (1996)
A sequel to Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer that lacks the raw and disturbing quality of its predecessor both in its direction and in the recasting of anonymous Neil Giuntoli as Henry
The Fear (1994)
Rather confused film about people on a therapy retreat to confront their fears who then have to deal with a wooden dummy that has maybe come to life
Trekkies 2 (2004)
A sequel to the Star Trek fandom documentary Trekkies. Here the filmmakers and Denise Crosby return to take in international fandom in all its permutations
Alien from L.A. (1988)
Head-scratching Albert Pyun oddity made for Cannon Films with Kathy Ireland searching for Atlantis underground. This emerges as a weird mix of Valley Girl comedy and Journey to the Center of the Earth
Romasanta: The Werewolf Hunt (2004)
From Paco Plaza, a beautifully made film supposedly based on a true incident featuring Julian Sands as a man placed on trail in 19th Century Spain with the defence that he is a werewolf
Merlin’s Apprentice (2006)
Sequel to Hallmark’s earlier tv mini-series Merlin featuring a return performance from Sam Neill in the title role, this is otherwise a generic and unmemorable work of Arthurian fantasy
Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome (1985)
The third of the Mad Max films sees the series becoming increasingly more mainstream in focus, along with the conscious resignation that it is impossible to top the previous film
Dracula (2002)
This conducts the interesting idea of updating Bram Stoker’s book to the present day with Patrick Bergin as Dracula. Ultimately, this suffers from low tv movie horizons
Werewolves on Wheels (1971)
The werewolf underwent some bizarre title mashups in the 1970s. This has the amusing idea of mashing the werewolf film up with the biker film. The results are played surprisingly seriously.
Shortbus (2006)
A second film from John Cameron Mitchell of Hedwig and the Angry Inch fame where Mitchell sets out to chart different flavours of sexuality in the 00s and does so with sometimes funny, othertimes outrageous effect. Included here for a heroine whose orgasm has the ability to cause power fluctuations
Stranger Than Fiction (2006)
Quite reasonable meta-fiction where a surprisingly subdued Will Ferrell discovers he is a character in a novel and tries to rebel against his fate
Hollywoodland (2006)
A film based around the suicide of tv’s Superman George Reeves, questioning whether it was a murder. The details are discussed in depth without ever arriving at a solution, while the casting adds up to an absorbing mystery
Gamera vs. Zigra (1971)
This was the seventh of the 1960s Gamera films and one of the worst of the series. By now, the film is pitched entirely to juvenile audiences, while the effects are pitiful
The Emerald Forest (1985)
John Boorman film with Powers Boothe searching for his son who has been snatched by Indians in the Amazon. A mystical film, the first to bring issues of deforestation of the Amazon rainforest to public attention
Percy’s Progress (1974)
Sequel to the British sex comedy Percy about the world’s first penis transplant in which the central character is now the last fertile man on Earth
The Fountain (2006)
Darren Aronofsky’s version of 2001: A Space Odyssey. A cryptic and baffling story that takes place in three different eras, all featuring the same actors. Aronofsky engages in much symbolic interplay but what is happening is a scratch of the head
Hannibal Rising (2007)
Building on the successes of the Hannibal Lecter films, this is a prequel that goes back sets out to tell an origin story of how the young teenage Hannibal came to be who he was during World War II
Tribulation (2000)
The third in a series of Biblical End Times films withGary Busey as a decent cop who wakes up in a future ruled by the Anti-Christ. The heavy-handed slinging of Bible verses makes this hard-going for anyone who is not a believer, while the conspiratorial tone frequently verges on nuttiness
Fungus the Bogeyman (2004)
BBC mini-series adaptation of Raymond Briggs’ classic children’s book about a secret underworld of bogeys who love all that is filthy and disgusting and their encounter with a human family
Mindhunters (2004)
Serial killer thriller from the perpetually terrible Renny Harlin. A variant on Agatha Christie’s Ten Little Indians, it promptly collapses into ludicrous plotting and an even more ridiculous string of deaths
Day of the Dead 2: Contagium (2005)
Made during the mid-2000s zombie revival, this is a cheap, badly made film that tries to cling to any kind of relevance to the George Romero name. If anything it is more like a sequel to Night of the Living Dead than to Day of the Dead
Cursed (2005)
Wes Craven and Kevin Williamson had the huge hit of Scream but failed to replicate that with this werewolf film, which was a behind the scenes nightmare that emerges as a mess on screen
Can’t Be Heaven (1998)
A low-budget Coming of Age story about growing up in an Italian-American neighbourhood. Ralph Macchio turns up as a ghostly saxophonist to offer advice
Candyman: Farewell to the Flesh (1995)
The first of the Candyman sequels, this goes back to add a Candyman origin story but mostly rehashes the first film. Director Bill Condon’s constant straining for effect becomes maddening
Saw III (2006)
Third of the Saw films and the point where director Darren Lynn Bousman places the series’ focus on grim gore-drenched sadism and torture
Happy Feet (2006)
George Miller of Mad Max fame makes a motion-capture animated film about a young penguin who sets out to fulfill his dream of tap-dancing. This ends up being a film of unexpectedly winning charms
Epic Movie (2007)
Probably the worst of Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer witless and painfully unfunny films – this just consists of a series of vulgar gags run over a bunch of scenes from films that came out in the last twelve months
Volver (2006)
Pedro Almodovar film in which two daughters try to deal with their mother’s seeming return from the dead
Eragon (2006)
A dragon fantasy adapted from a popular book series that has Lord of the Rings wannabe stamped all over it and only unimaginatively follows in Peter Jackson’s footsteps
Deja Vu (2006)
Tony Scott directed time travel film with Denzel Washington viewing and then entering into events of the past in an effort to stop a terrorist bombing. Action driven as you might expect with Jerry Bruckheimer as producer
Without Warning! (1952)
Fascinating early psycho film about the police hunt for Adam Williams who kills girls with garden shears
The Santa Clause 3: The Escape Clause (2006)
Third of the Santa Clause films starring Tim Allen as Santa where his reality is upended by the evil Jack Frost
Flushed Away (2006)
Aardman Animation abandon Claymation for regular animation in this story of a pet rat thrown out of his comfort zone down into the sewers. Alas, this only serves to make it just another talking animals animated film
Open Season (2006)
Passable animated film from Sony Pictures Animation, although the story arcs too closely resemble every other animated film for it to have much in the way of notability
Night of the Dead “Leben Tod” (2006)
Entry in the 00s zombie revival fad from the early days of The Asylum, this is the most gore-drenched zombie film ever made. Overlooked but a better film than you think
Night at the Museum (2006)
Popular family hit with Ben Stiller as a night watchman at New York’s Museum of Natural History who discovers that the exhibits come to life at night. More a cute idea than a full film, there is some fun to the characters and effects
MirrorMask (2005)
Neil Gaiman and comic-book artist Dave McKean create a venture into a fantasy world with an extraordinary level of visual imagination and peopled with a remarkable panoply of creations. The results are quite unlike any other film you have seen
Charlotte’s Web (2006)
Charlotte’s Web gets the Babe treatment and is turned into a live-action film with CGI barnyard animals and name actors. Here the enormous charms of the original are replaced by cute and mawkish cues
Arthur and the Invisibles (2006)
Lightweight Luc Besson directed children’s fantasy with a young boy shrunken down to miniature size to engage in a series of CGI animated adventures among a race of fairy-like people. Several sequels followed
Apocalypto (2006)
Mel Gibson seems to love directing historical spectacles with an emphasis on bloody brutality. Here he creates a bloodthirsty adventure set among the Mayan peoples
A Sound of Thunder (2005)
Adaptation of the classic Ray Bradbury time travel story is overblown as a ridiculous big-budget film filled with bad science where the original point of the story disappears in a script that makes no sense
House of Whipcord (1974)
The best film from UK director Pete Walker. All of Walker’s film have a horror of ingrained institutionalism. This, concerning a private prison where morally lax women are abducted and tortured, is depicted with an extraordinary cruelty
Wilderness (2006)
Tough brutal British film where a group of youth offenders are hunted while on a wilderness survival course on an island
Seven Mummies (2006)
Horror film where escaped convicts wander into a Western ghost town where a gold treasure is guarded by mummies
Rohtenburg (2006)
Film based on true-life German cannibal Armin Meiwes who met a man online and by mutual agreement killed and ate his body
Miss Potter (2006)
Renee Zellweger stars in a biopic of children’s author Beatrix Potter from Babe director Chris Noonan
The Kindness of Strangers (2006)
Quite good British tv mini-series psycho-thriller in which calculating Hermione Norris sneaks her way in and takes over the home of Julie Graham stealing her husband and gaslighting her
Clownhouse (1989)
An incredibly eerie and haunting killer clown film from Victor Salva. This is one of the few films that capture something of the spooky suspense of John Carpenter’s Halloween
Razorback (1984)
Russell Mulcahy, a director fresh from success on the early days of MTV, returned to his native Australia to make this extraordinary variant on the Animals Attack film. Mulcahy piles on amazing photography, turning the landscape into something otherwordly
The Prestige (2006)
Christopher Nolan directs a beautiful period piece with Christian Bale and Hugh Jackman as rival Victorian stage magicians. The film is an elegantly crafted Hall of Mirrors and illusions, capped by sterling performances from all involved