Live Animals (2008)
A film made not long after the advent of the Torture Porn fad in which a group of friends are imprisoned on a farm to be broken and sold into slavery
The Lost World: Jurassic Park (1997)
The first sequel to the massive success of Jurassic Park where Steven Spielberg returns to direct with a script that seems a mishmash of loose ends that only weakly rehashes the original
Lowlifes (2024)
This starts out seeming like it is going to be a regular Backwoods Brutality film about a regular family threatened by hicks before expectations are abruptly turned on their head
The Luck of the Irish (2001)
A Disney Channel film where Ryan Merriman discovers that he is the child of leprechaun parents. A mad pastiche of Irish culture, related to the earlier film in name only
Manhattan Baby (1982)
Lucio Fulci film about a series of supernatural deaths caused by an Egyptian amulet. An incoherent and plotless mess filled with random supernatural effects and occasional gore scenes
Mary Had a Little Lamb (2023)
The people behind Winnie-the-Pooh: Blood and Honey deliver a horror version of the nursery rhyme. Here Mary becomes a middle-aged woman living in the woods with a hulking son who has a lamb’s head
Mass Effect: Paragon Lost (2012)
Another instance of a computer game or film franchise turning to anime to conduct a spinoff. While Mass Effect has an impressive reputation on the console screen, the film here is a dull piece that only comes in around the level of a production line animated tv episode
Mega Shark vs. Crocosaurus (2010)
The first sequel to The Asylum’s Mega Shark vs Giant Octopus and marginally a better film. This is less sparing with the cheap effects, while in every other regard it plants tongue-in-cheek and tries to make a virtue out of the sheer ridiculousness of the action
Memoirs of a Survivor (1981)
Adaptation of a Doris Lessing novel set in a collapsing future England. Nicely portrayed but crytpically surreal touches end up baffling
Mirrors 2 (2010)
A sequel to Alexandre Aja’s Mirrors that abandons most of the basics of the first film and strips everything down to a series of gory, novelty deaths
Moana 2 (2024)
Disney make a sequel to Moana, their venture into Pacific Island mythology
The Monkey King (2001)
A tv mini-series adaptation of the famous Chinese legend Journey to the West made for US audiences by Hallmark Entertainment. The story remains stolidly earthbound and the meta-fictional contortions the story has to add to engage in to have the monk hero replaced by a contemporary Thomas Gibson are bizarre
Monolith (1994)
Ridiculous action film produced at the peak of The X Files popularity about two detectives against a body-hopping alien and sinister government agency
Mother/Android (2021)
A directorial outing from Mattson Tomlin, a screenwriter on the rise of recent, Chloe Grace Moretz is a pregnant woman struggling to survive in the aftermath of the android rebellion
Mufasa: The Lion King (2024)
The Lion King was one of the worst of the live-action Disney remakes. Now comes this prequel
Munger Road (2011)
Film about an escaped killer and teenagers stalked on a haunted stretch of road. A film that creates mystery about what is happening only to reach a frustrating non-resolution. Without the well-known name of Bruce Davison, this would only be low-budget amateur film
The Murder Mansion (1972)
Spanish film about a group of people gathered at a mansion as spooky happenings begin happening and people are killed off
My Soul to Take (2010)
A misfire from the usually reliable Wes Craven, this drearily traipses through a slasher/supernatural plot that lacks any surprises or Craven’s characteristic atmosphere
The Mysterious Doctor (1943)
Film made during World War II about the locals of small English town dealing with a haunted mine and uncovering a Nazi infiltration plot
A Name for Evil (1973)
Obscure almost interesting film where Robert Culp drops out of city life, renovates a possibly haunted house before being drawn into a surreal Free Love fantasia
Night Angel (1990)
Erotic horror as the demon Lilith attempts to take over a fashion magazine
Night of the Blood Beast (1958)
Roger Corman’s brother produces a low-budget film that borrows a few leafs from The Quatermass Xperiment in its story of an astronaut who returns having been resurrected from the dead by alien invaders.
The Nun II (2023)
More from James Wan’s The Conjuring Universe, this places more focus on mood and atmosphere than The Nun’s ludicrous jump effects
Omega Cop (1990)
A low-budget post-apocalyptic action film featuring the almost completely forgotten martial arts and (non)-actor Ron Marchini who must venture out into the ruined city to rescue three girls
One Missed Call: Final (2006)
Takashi Miike’s One Missed Call was one of the more popular of the Ringu-influenced Japanese ghost stories, concerning a viral curse passed by cellphone calls. This was the second Japanese sequel
The Other Me (2000)
Disney Channel film about a cloned kid. The result indifferently slung together and the basic premise dealt with in a hardly serious way
The Outsider (1996)
Low-budget film that steals the premise of Westworld in the story of an amusement park that recreates the world of 1940s film noir with androids, which proceed to go amok
Passionate Revenge (1996)
Low-budget director Fred Olen Ray makes a softcore variation on Fatal Attraction with a vengeful Shauna O’Brien obtaining a job as the babysitter with the married man who jilted her
Pegasus vs. Chimera (2012)
One of the numerous ‘vs’ films that came out after Mega Shark vs Giant Octopus, this is actually a B-budget fantasy adventure made for cable. This is not particularly bad, just routine and uninspired on all counts where the budget cramps any of its imaginative horizons
Percy’s Progress (1974)
Sequel to the British sex comedy Percy about the world’s first penis transplant in which the central character is now the last fertile man on Earth
The Phantom (2009)
A mini-series based on the classic comic-book masked hero but the attempts to modernise The Phantom for the post-Dark Knight era seem bizarrely awkward
Pig Hunt (2008)
One of the most conceptually confusing films I have seen in some time – it starts out seeming like a film about people hunting a near-mythical giant pig before abruptly veering off into Backwoods Brutality territory and then out of the blue introducing a sinister cult to the mix
Pippi on the Run (1973)
Fourth and final of the Swedish live-action films based on Astrid Lindgren’s child heroine Pippi Longstocking
Plague (1978)
Canadian-made thriller about the accidental release of a deadly plague from a laboratory. This is rather dull and never does anything that does not retread cliches
Popeye’s Revenge (2025)
One of several Popeye horror films that were made after the popular comic-strip character came into public domain in 2025. This is essentially Popeye by way of Friday the 13th
The Preacher’s Wife (1996)
Remake of The Bishop’s Wife with Denzel Washington as an angel come to aid an overworked pastor but falling for his wife Whitney Houston
Prisoners of the Sun (2013)
The director of Battlefield Earth teams up with Uwe Boll to deliver a sub-Indiana Jones adventure about venturing into an Egyptian pyramid in search of Ancient Astronauts. The tomb raider cliches are so tired and creaky that the film fails to generate any excitement
Project Shadowchaser III (1995)
Third in the series about android terrorists, this is now about an amok android on a spaceship
Prophet (1999)
Fred Olen Ray and Don ‘The Dragon’ Wilson combine forces on a low-budget action film about psychic powers. The action scenes are competent but the film lacking in the script department
Ravenous (1999)
Film about the soldiers at a fort on the American frontier who have descended to cannibalism. A good set-up falls apart due to a comedy treatment
The Reaping (2007)
Reasonable budgeted film about a series of Biblical plagues being visited upon a rural Louisiana town. An interesting set up that flounders amid a confused script
Red Letters (2019)
A film about occult detectives investigating a missing police officer. This then conducts a mid-film bait and switch on us as to what it is about and actually becomes a faith film
Red Team (2000)
Serial killer thriller about an FBI team who realise they are hunting a killer who targets other serial killers
Red Water (2003)
B killer shark films where environmentalists, oil rig workers and drug dealers converge on a Louisiana river where a shark lurks
Redcon-1 (2018)
An action film about soldiers on an expedition into a zombie-filled quarantine zone. This comes with a furious pace that feels more as though you are watching a videogame than a film
Relative Fear (1994)
Routine variant on the psycho child theme, which heads into rather dubious territory when it leads us to think a series of killings are being conducted by an autistic child
Repentance (2014)
A film with identity disorder – the title and promotion makes it seem a revenge-action film only for it to conduct a number of strange doglegs and eventually arrive at a plot wherein life coach Anthony Mackie is tied up in the cellar by Forest Whitaker who feeds his inspirational lines back at him
The Rise of the Beast (2022)
Low-budget British film about environmental protestors pursued by a genetically engineered giant ape
The Ritual (2025)
A film based on what is said to be the most well-documented exorcism in US history. Al Pacino plays the exorcist
The Ritual Killer (2023)
A film that stands much in the shadow of Se7en and the serial killer thriller with Morgan Freeman tracking a ritual African killer
Robot Ninja (1989)
The title sounds like a cheesy 80s killer android film but this is actually about a comic-book artist who becomes a costumed vigilante. A strange mix of superhero with no powers, a splatter film and Death Wish
Robot Revolution (2015)
Micro-budgeted SF film where a nanoswarm is accidentally released, taking over an apartment building and reprogramming technology
Rollerball (2002)
Remade, the 1975 dystopian film about future sports is stripped of any of its big message (even of its future setting) and is turned into no more than a formulaic action film
Roswell: The Aliens Attack (1999)
Alien invasion film set around the so-called Roswell Incident. Faux science-fiction written by cliche the entire way
The Santa Clause 2 (2002)
The first of two sequels to The Santa Clause with Tim Allen as Santa Claus, this benefits from a bigger budget
Scary Movie 2 (2001)
The first of the Scary Movie sequels. The Wayans Brothers extend the gag beyond the slasher movie to take on the ghost story and exorcism film while aiming squarely for Lowest Common Denominator humour
Screamers: The Hunting (2009)
Disappointing sequel to the modest original that does little but revisit and re-run the first film’s scenario with little to add to it
The Seeker: The Dark is Rising (2007)
Adaptation of Susan Cooper’s popular fantasy series handled by people who have no interest in the material and badly rewrite/mangle it in order try to turn it into a Harry Potter/Lord of the Rings knockoff
The Severed Arm (1973)
A classic attention-grabbing title from the heyday of the exploitation film … After receiving a severed arm in the mail, a group of friends realise that a former friend has come seeking revenge for when they were trapped down a mine and agreed to cut off his arm because they had nothing to eat
Shadow of the Hawk (1976)
Jan-Michael Vincent plays a young man who is reluctantly drawn in by his Native American grandfather’s war against a black sorcerer
Shark Bait (2022)
Another horror film about survival in shark-infested waters where a group of partying teens on Spring Break are left clinging to a damaged jet ski as sharks circle and pick them off
Shark Killer (2015)
This is one killer shark film of the 2010s that does not come in a deliberately ridiculous vein and concerns the hunt for a shark that has swallowed a valuable diamond
Shirley Thompson Versus the Aliens (1972)
One of the other films from Jim Sharman, director of The Rocky Horror Picture Show, a gonzo comedy where alien visitors bring a statue of the Duke of Edinburgh to life
Son of Dracula (1943)
The third of Universal’s Dracula films in which Dracula travels to Louisiana in search of a wife. A flabby Lon Chaney Jr makes a poor replacement for Bela Lugosi, while the script seems improbably stitched together – despite the title, the film features Dracula, not his son
Stan Helsing: A Parody (2009)
Film from one of the producers of Scary Movie that heads for the same lowbrow comedy routines while spoofing 80s horror films
Star Trek: Nemesis (2002)
The last of the films spun off from Star Trek: The Next Generation and a dismal flop that killed the film series off. Tom Hardy as a bad guy Romulan is a cardboard threat while the uninspired plot rehashes The Wrath of Khan
Stitch! The Movie (2003)
Cheaply made video-released sequel to Lilo & Stitch, which is only a rehash but does surprisingly reunite all the voice talents
Stormbreaker (2006)
Film adaptation of a popular series of Young Adult books about a teenage spy. Made not long after the Austin Powers films, this seems unable to decide if it is being serious or a parody
The Strange Hostel of Naked Pleasures (1976)
Jose Mojica Marins, the cult Brazilian director/actor best known as the demoniac undertaker Ze do Caixao/Coffin Joe, presides over a hotel where the guests meet sinister fates
The Strange World of Planet X (1958)
1950s British science-fiction entry that draws influence from the Quatermass films. While the title(s) leads you to expect an alien invasion entry, it is in actuality more of a British copy of a giant insect film. A routine effort that is eventually done in by utterly impoverished giant insect effects
The Strangers: Chapter 2 (2025)
The Strangers was an incredibly eerie home invasion story that has become a modern classic. This is the second chapter in a trilogy of reboot films that have been handed over to the perpetually terrible Renny Harlin
Straw Dogs (2011)
Another wholly unnecessary remake that waters the raw savagery of the original down to a safe tepidness. Everything that the original set down has now become formulaic
Subliminal Seduction (1996)
Ian Ziering stars in a B-budget ripoff of The Stepford Wives where he discovers that a computer company is encoding brainwashing messages in a videogame
Swamp Thing (1982)
Wes Craven makes a film based on the DC Comics character but reduces the mood of the original to something cartoonish. One of Craven’s worst films
The Thompsons (2012)
The Hamiltons was an unusual film about a strange family who were eventually revealed to be vampires. By the time of this sequel, all the interesting elements of the original have been eliminated and all that we have is a film of tired poses that fails to add anything to the overworked vampire genre
Thunder Force (2021)
Melissa McCarthy, along with Octavia Spencer as her best friend, is a comic screw-up who obtain superpowers
Time Toys (2016)
Children’s film with the promising idea of kids finding a bunch of toys from the future that grant them amazing abilities unaware they have world-destroying potential.; The idea is alas watered down to the blandness of family formula and the limited conceptual horizons of a low budget
Tomie (1999)
Another Japanese horror film that stands heavily in the shadow of Ringu. Directed without much style and often uninteresting to the point of being dull, it is hard to tell from this that you are watching a film that inspired eight sequels
Transformers: Rise of the Beasts (2023)
The seventh of the live-action Transformers films, the second made after Michael Bay stepped down from the director’s chair
Transformers: The Last Knight (2017)
The fifth of Michael Bay’s Transformers films. This comes with more of an outright comedy focus than any of the other films where Bay seems to be second-guessing his critics and spoofing his own peccadilloes in quote marks, only to produce the silliest entry in the series yet
A Twist of Faith (1999)
Dull serial killer thriller with Andrew McCarthy tracking a killer that has a Catholic fixation
Underworld: Awakening (2012)
Yet another entry that nobody asked for in a conceptually threadbare series that nobody seems to like … passably better than the last two sequels due to some ok action moves but still empty-headed in terms of ideas
Universal Soldier III: Unfinished Business (1998)
he second of two cheap video-released sequels to the Jean-Claude Van Damme film. This has the novelty of featuring Burt Reynolds as the bad guy
Vampires: The Turning (2005)
Supposedly a second sequel to John Carpenter’s Vampires but of little connection otherwise, this is a film of uneven effect about warring vampire clans in Thailand
Warnings (2003)
A blatant copy of M. Night Shyamalan’s Signs even down to the near-identical title and a similar plot about crop circles appearing on a farm presaging an alien invasion
Womaneater (1957)
Behind the lurid title, this concerns a mad scientist sacrificing women to a plant in his basement … This came out the same year as Hammer Films burst onto the English horror scene and by comparison is a plodding affair with no greater ambition than being a 1940s Bela Lugosi cheapie
Would You Rather (2012)
The old party game about choosing between two difficult decisions is spun out into a rather lame attempt to make another Saw. Given a generic commercial handling, the film fails to get inside the psychological tension of its life and death decisions
The Yeti (2026)
A monster movie based around The Yeti, this starts out as a B-budget adventure film with an expedition to Alaska in search of missing explorers who become trapped by a ferocious Yeti
You Can’t Kill Stephen King (2012)
You have to admit the title gets your attention but this is otherwise a slasher film of sorts about a group in search of Stephen King’s home