Hostel Part II (2007)
Eli Roth’s sequel to his earlier hit, this emerges as a pallid copy of its predecessor, having merely changed the sexes of the protagonists and lacking the original’s gut-churning impact
Zoom: Academy for Superheroes (2006)
Family-friendly superhero film that places more focus on slapstick than superheroics and contains an embarrassing return to the screen for Chevy Chase
Empathy (2007)
British clairvoyance thriller with an almost identical premise to The Dead Zone. Familiar material told with a modest effectiveness
Project: ALF (1996)
A tv movie revival of the hit 1980s tv sitcom ALF. Looking back it’s hard to wonder what ever seemed funny about the show at the time
Erotic Ghost Story – Perfect Match (1997)
Film posing as a sequel in the Hong Kong-made Erotic Ghost Story series, this consists of random sexual encounters and comic interludes without much connecting plot
Hercules (2005)
What approach can this Hallmark mini-series take that hasn’t been exhausted by the numerous other Hercules films? Answer: Simply tell the Greek myth as it was written. At which it does not too badly
Saigon (1988)
Vietnam War film where the setting makes a unique and surprisingly effective backdrop for a modern film noir psycho-thriller
Wing Commander (1999)
Star Wars meets Top Gun – a concept it is surprising no one has thought of before – but alas this film adaptation of the popular videogame only regurgitates the cliches of either film
Quarantine (2008)
English-language remake of the Spanish Found Footage film [Rec]. A lesser work but in the hands of John Erick Dowdle one of the few English-language horror remakes that stands up to the original
The Day the Earth Stood Still (2008)
An interesting if uneven remake of the 1950s SF classic from Scott Derrickson that smartly updates the story from the Atomic Age to a post-9/11 era to now deliver an environmental warning
Black Christmas (2006)
Another in the mid-2000s fad for 1970s remakes. This revives what has been cited as the first slasher film but throws most of the original out and turns the rest into a gore-drenched slasher film
Barbie Mariposa (2008)
Another of Mainframe’s interminable Barbie films that soon slip into a sameness. This is at least directed with a visual sweep
Appleseed (2004)
A dazzling reboot of the earlier manga/anime made with stunning photorealistic animation design and breathtaking action scenes that made this a benchmark for modern anime. Sequels followed.
Android Apocalypse (2006)
A variation on The Defiant Ones with a human and an android chained together but this fails to find anything to say either about androids or prejudice
Alferd Packer: The Musical (1996)
The first film from South Park‘s creator Trey Parker, a willfully absurd musical based on the story of a true-life cannibal. Amateurish but worth seeing by completists
Liquid Dreams (1991)
An offbeat science-fiction film sold as a work of erotica but one that actually subverts the genre in interesting ways concerning a futuristic apartment block performers where strippers are being fed a drug
Madagascar: Escape 2 Africa (2008)
A reasonable sequel to DreamWorks’ Madagascar that this time actually takes the characters to Africa where it determines to give each of them their own story
Death Sentence (2007)
Although the character names have been changed, this is based on the book sequel to Death Wish. Saw director James Wan goes for broke on the grim vigilantism and turns in an immensely satisfying work
Ghostboat (2006)
Modestly effective tv mini-series about the crew of a British submarine in the 1980s being taken over by the ghosts from a World War II submarine
Secret Smile (2005)
Creepy UK tv mini-series with David Tennant as a psycho boyfriend obsessed with Kate Ashfield
Doomsday (2008)
Immensely satisfying film from Neil Marshall set in a walled-off, post-pandemic Scotland where he seems to have set out to pay homage to sf/action films like Escape from New York and Mad Max 2
Storm of the Century (1999)
One of the best Stephen King tv mini-series with Colm Feore as a mysterious stranger who manipulates and turns an entire town against themselves
Sublime (2007)
Horror film in which Tom Cavanagh goes into hospital for a routine procedure only to emerge with his leg amputated amid increasingly more surreal things happening around the hospital
The Simian Line (2000)
New Age film where a psychic makes a prediction about the couples at a party splitting up and how this affects all present
The Rugrats Movie (1998)
The first film spinoff of the popular animated tv series Rugrats about infants observing the adult world
Ghost Town (2008)
Director/screenwriter David Koepp proves that comedy is not his forte in this light fantasy in which Ricky Gervais emerges from anaesthesia to find that he can now see ghosts
Planet Terror (2007)
Robert Rodriguez’s half of the Grindhouse double-bill where Rodriguez makes an hilariously tongue-in-cheek zombie film with great absurd comic energy and packed with witty cameos from various stars
The Shaggy Dog (2006)
The remake of the old Disney comedy becomes a vehicle for Tim Allen, played with a manic slapstickery wherein Allen demonstrates there are few levels of silliness he will travel to in imitating dog-like behaviours
Billion Dollar Brain (1967)
Third of the Harry Palmer spy films starring Michael Caine, which were made as a more grounded alternative to James Bond. Unfortunately, this has been placed in the hands of Ken Russell who overblows everything with a giddy eatravagance
Riverworld (2003)
The first adaptation of Philip Jose Farmer’s series of novels where every person who ever lived is resurrected on an alien planet is given an abysmal treatment as a tv movie that ditches and rewrites major aspects of the books
The PianoTuner of EarthQuakes (2005)
The second feature film from the Quay Brothers, a bafflingly incomprehensible work of surrealism, strange designs and non-sequitir dialogue
Mirrors (2008)
Alexandre Aja film about haunted mirrors. Aja is more a director of physical horror and seems less attuned to the supernatural mood
Death Race (2008)
Paul W.S. Anderson’s remake of Death Race 2000 strips the satire from the original and turns it into a modern action movie – a to-the-death car chase film set in a near-future prison
Cavegirl (1985)
Witless and inane comedy in which nerdy high school student Daniel Roebuck is thrown back in time to the Stone Age where he romances cavegirl Cindy Ann Thompson
Eaten Alive (1977)
The first film that Tobe Hooper made immediately after The Texas Chain Saw Massacre, a dementedly OTT Southern Gothic with Neville Brand as a backwoods motelier serving up his guests to the crocodiles
Invasion of the Neptune Men (1961)
A Japanese SF film with Sonny Chiba as superhero fighting off alien invaders. This has a tatty cheapness that takes it well and truly places into bad movie territory.
The Lost Room (2006)
One of the most conceptually ingenious tv mini-series ever created concerning a quest for objects from a mysterious hotel room that have been imbued with amazing powers.
Leprechaun 2 (1994)
The second in the Leprechaun series with Warwick Davis delivering a series of extremely silly novelty deaths accompanied by excruciating one-liners
Saw V (2008)
Fifth of the Saw films. By now the series has developed such a complicated backstory it is difficult following how it all pieces together
Superman: Doomsday (2007)
A condensed animated adaptation of the top-selling DC comic-book of all time The Death of Superman that comes with some massively exciting animated action set-pieces
The Wisdom of Crocodiles (1998)
A uniquely different take on the vampire film, directed with extraordinary stylism by Hong Kong director Po Chih Leong
Under the Rainbow (1981)
Widely considered a bad film, this is a slapstick comedy starring Chevy Chase and Carrie Fisher set around the dwarves during the making of The Wizard of Oz
Dr. Jekyll and Mr Hyde (2008)
Modernised version of the Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde story starring Dougary Scott. The principal novelty here is that the bulk of the story takes place in a courtroom as Hyde is placed on trial for murder
Laputa: Castle in the Sky (1986)
Visually stunning Hayao Miyazaki film about the search for a lost city of the clouds Soaring adventure in an alternate world of airship fantasies, rendered in a series of breathtaking vistas
Rogue (2007)
The second film from Greg McLean, made directly after the hit of Wolf Creek. In this tale of a killer crocodile. McLean borrows more than a few pages from Jaws to create an incredibly gruelling and intense ride
The Quick and the Undead (2006)
Exactly as the title suggests, a mash-up between the zombie film and a Western (albeit relocated to a post-apocalyptic future) – and one that plays itself surprisingly seriously
Return of the Living Dead III (1993)
Brian Yuzna’s entry is the only worthwhile effort among the sequels to Dan O’Bannon’s Return of the Living Deadwhere Yuzna adds an original plot about a zombie girlfriend and the film is spiked with perverse imagery
Minutemen (2008)
Disney Channel film about a trio of kids who build a time machine and use it to help people around the school
The Mummy (1932)
The original mummy film starring Boris Karloff. Unlike the sequels where the mummy became a slow, shuffling creature, this is a subtle classic with haunted mood.
A Tale of Two Sisters (2003)
A South Korean ghost story that achieves quite a degree of spookiness, albeit influenced by the Japanese Ring phenomenon, although things fall apart at a confusing twist ending
A Christmas Carol (1999)
For my money, the best adaptation of the multiply-filmed Charles Dickens tale. Patrick Stewart is a great Scrooge and the film respects the story, giving its milieu and central character life as a tale for adults
Funny Games U.S. (2007)
Michael Haneke’s English-language remake of his earlier home invasion film has a sense of pointlessness to it. But in following the original so closely, it also cannot help but work where it did
Wrong Turn 2: Dead End (2007)
A sequel that has been arranged for the sole purpose of serving up a series of gory dispatch set-pieces every few minutes
Stepfather III (1992)
A shabby sequel where the classic original where Terry O’Quinn is replaced by another actor and everything reduced to no more than a routine slasher film
The World’s Greatest Athlete (1973)
A Disney live-action comedy that puts a Tarzan character on the athletics field for some inspired nonsense
See No Evil: The Moors Murders (2006)
True Crime mini-series based on the infamous Moors Murders of the 1960s and one that seems determined to conduct the least interesting account of the murders possible
The Sixth Man (1997)
Exceedingly lightweight effort about Marlon Wayans’ ghost brother aiding their basketball team, which proves as predictable as one expects
Reign in Darkness (2002)
Australian vampire action that feels like a single pose that has been inspired by too many watchings of The Matrix
Mother of Tears: The Third Mother (2007)
After 27 years, Dario Argento finally rounds out his Three Mothers trilogy begun with Suspiria. However, the underwhelming results give all evidence of his having lost his mojo
Max Payne (2008)
Based on the popular videogame, this is fairly much Death Wish by way of Jacob’s Ladder. An expensive studio film that proves an underwhelming delivery of its promise
Day of the Dead (2008)
A remake of George Romero’s third and most underrated zombie film, This came out as part of the 2000s revival of the genre but majorly miscalculates the original and emerges as wrong in just about every way
Bloodrayne: Deliverance (2007)
The second in Uwe Boll’s trilogy adapted from the videogame, this plays out as a mix of Western and vampire hunter film and is marginally better than Boll’s usual standards
Eagle Eye (2008)
Shia LaBeouf ends up on the run from the FBI in a conspiracy involving an A.I. A thriller about the surveillance society that, despite much sound and fury, finds almost nothing to say about its subject
Space Chimps (2008)
An animated film about NASA experimental chimpanzees. Not quite up there with Pixar but an amiable and unpretentious and amiable outing
Wanted (2008)
The film that Hitman should have been concerning a secret world of super-powered assassins, revved up by out of this world visuals from Timur Bekmambetov
Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008)
Theatrical spinoff from the Star Wars prequels, released to introduce the popular animated series. This shows it is time for George Lucas to move beyond recycling something that was successful three decades ago
The Forbidden Kingdom (2008)
Westernised homage to Wu Xia and the Shaw Brothers film with an American teen transported back to Ancient China, this has all the thrill of junior-grade martial arts tournament
Slayer (2007)
Amateur-made grunge vampire film that has some interesting ambitions but ultimately does not make enough about its story clear
Hellboy II: The Golden Army (2008)
In the second and the best of his two Hellboy films, Guillermo Del Toro expands the first out with an amazing menagerie of eccentric and offbeat creatures
Wall-E (2008)
A near-dialogueless story of a lonely robot clearing up junk in the aftermath of civilisation. This is surely Pixar’s most endearing film to date where they are operating at the peak of their creativity
Mysterious Island (2005)
Hallmark tv mini-series adaptation of Jules Verne’s desert island drama featuring no less than Patrick Stewart as Captain Nemo. This sinks badly amid incredibly shoddy giant animal digital effects
The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor (2008)
The third of the Brendan Fraser Mummy films that feels like it has no point other than to steal $10 from your hand and give you a bucket of content free mental popcorn in return
The Messengers (2007)
The Pang Brothers, two of the most exciting genre directors in the world, have their distinctive style swallowed up in their bland US mainstream debut produced by Sam Raimi
Martian Child (2007)
Adapted from a David Gerrold book, this is essentially the Adam Sandler adopts a kid film Big Daddy by way of K-PAX and its ambiguous alien visitor
Journey to the Center of the Earth 3D (2008)
This family friendly adaptation of the classic Jules Verne novel was made to highlight the 3D process and throws most of the book out to essentially become Jules Verne the theme park ride
Beverly Hills Chihuahua (2008)
One of the most inane talking animals film ever – the tale of a spoiled Beverly Hills dogs who has to make her way home after being abandoned in Mexico. Filled with excruciating slapstick and animals spouting smartass one-liners
Babylon A.D. (2008)
This was critically dismissed – even its director spoke out against it – nevertheless it proves a flawed but not entirely uninteresting French Cyberpunk film as mercenary Vin Diesel is hired to protect miracle girl Melane Thierry
The X Files: I Want to Believe (2008)
The second theatrical spinoff from The X Files, a dismally dull entry where one wonders how the people who created one of the great tv shows of the 1990s got it all wrong
Teeth (2007)
An outrageous premise – a girl has a vagina with teeth – that is played with far more good taste that one expects
Evangelion 1.0: You Are (Not) Alone (2007)
The first in a series of film reboots of the Neon Genesis Evangelion anime tv series. Epic animation but you need to the part of the fanbase of the original to understand what is going on
Frontier(s) (2007)
Xavier Gens delivers a French copy of The Texas Chain Saw Massacre. This is largely by the numbers excepting for a gore level raised to what must be a maximum for the genre
Vexille (2007)
Anime film about an android-overrun future Japan that resembles another episode of the Appleseed franchise
[Rec] (2007)
![[Rec] (2007) poster](https://moriareviews.com/rongulator/wp-content/uploads/rec-2007-poster-3.jpg)
Furious and highly engaging Spanish Found Footage film about the infected dead taking over an apartment building. Three sequels and an English-language remake followed
Max & Co (2007)
An amiable Swiss Claymation effort not dissimilar to Aardman’s films concerning a young fox troubadour who takes a stand against a tyrannical fly swat manufacturer
Let the Right One In (2008)
A strong and unusual Swedish vampire film that is less a horror film than one about friendship between a boy and the very strange girl next door who we gradually realise is a vampire
Castle Freak (1995)
Stuart Gordon had a cult hit with Re-Animator and much of the rest of his career felt like his attempting to repeat that. Here he re-teams with many of the Re-Animator personnel for what is essentially a rehash of a 1960s Italian Gothic film
War Between the Planets (1966)
One of the various Italian space operas of the 1960s from director Antonio Margheriti. This has a certain colourful ambition despite frequently being let down by cheap effects
Stuart Little 3: Call of the Wild (2005)
The third of the Stuart Little films, this one animated instead of its live-action predecessors
Fear(s) of the Dark (2007)
A visually striking compilation of five animated French horror tales. Each varies widely in style but the result is far more extraordinary than many live-action counterparts
Timecrimes (2007)
The debut film from Nacho Vigalondo, a time travel (or more correctly time paradox) film that holds a real delight in its conceptual dexterity with which Vigalondo keeps winding the story around on itself
The Orphanage (2007)
A Spanish ghost story that effectively eschews modern jumpshock tactics in favour of subtle old-fashioned scares
Be Kind Rewind (2008)
Riding at a peak during the mid-2000s, cult director Michel Gondry made this head-scratcher where he eccentrically devotes an entire film to homemade amateur fan filmmaking – all with appealingly wacky results
Captain America (1979)
Laughably cheap and dull tv pilot version of comic-book superhero, which emerges less the Captain America of Marvel Comics fame than Captain America imagined as Evel Knievel superhero
The Strangers (2008)
A harrowing home assault film that highlighted the debut of Bryan Bertino, a new director of considerable promise. The surprise about the film is just how much influence it has had on other works subsequently
Taken (2002)
TV mini-series in ten two-hour parts that deals with UFOs, covering several generations from the 1940s to the present. An interesting take on UFO encounters with the benefit of some phenomenal performances
Meet Dave (2008)
Off-the wall Eddie Murphy comedy in which he plays an alien spaceship disguised as a human come to Earth. All the fun comes from watching Murphy’s wacky antics, which buoy up the film’s weaker moments
The Girl Who Leapt Through Time (2006)
Mamoru Hosoda delivers an appealingly sweet anime about a girl who discovers that she has the ability to travel through time. Based on a popular Japanese Young Adult novel
Hancock (2008)
This offers the appealing idea of Will Smith as a cynical burned out superhero. The film tells a comic tale of his redemption before suddenly losing the plot altogether in its second half
Pop Skull (2007)
Micro-budgeted early Adam Wingard film that delves into the disturbed mental spaces of a depressed man
My Winnipeg (2007)
Guy Maddin was hired by the Documentary Channel to make a documentary about his hometown Winnipeg and turns it into a surreal confabulation of fact and tall tale